Arrested By You
by SparklingFae
A/N: All Characters are property of SM, I just like to play with them. A huge Thanks to my Beta NCChris, she makes everything I do all better.
Sam POV
I lay with her in my arms in the dark of the guest room, thinking she looked so beautiful asleep with her hair spread over the pillow like a halo. I couldn’t help the anger that was simmering just beneath the surface of my psyche, however. Yet again it seemed Bella Swan had tried to run instead of facing her problems. Things were different this time though. It wasn’t just her heart that would be broken if she left; this time my heart would go with her and I couldn’t handle another loss, not at her hands or anyone else's. Paul, well he was another matter altogether. He and I were going to have to settle a few fucking things. I was a grown fucking man and could make my own decisions without his interference.
I moved away from Bella and got up when I couldn’t hold back the growl any longer. My movement caused her to stir some but not wake, for which I was thankful. I knew I needed to discuss some things with her, but I needed a little time to gather my thoughts. Last night had left me emotionally overwrought and I didn’t want to say something I’d regret later. I drifted into the kitchen, needing to some coffee. I knew it wouldn't be long before she would be up and I wanted the time alone and caffeine before I had to face her. Once the coffee had brewed, I grabbed a cup, tossing some creamer into it, and went to sit outside on my porch.
I was staring out into the forest, lost in my own thoughts, when I heard Bella began to stir. It wasn't long before her footsteps came up behind me and she spoke softly.
"Morning, Sam."
I nodded in acknowledgement, my gaze still turned towards the forest as I finished off my coffee.
"Morning, Bella."
It was a moment before she spoke up again, tension thick in her voice.
"I'm sorry for last night…about Paul."
I slowly shifted my gaze towards her, almost coldly. I needed answers. I was angry and hurt.
"Why Bella? What made you want to run? You always seem to run when the going gets tough."
"I run, Sam. It's what I do. Damn it! I don't even know what I am running from! From you? Us? This place? Whatever the hell this is between us?"
Frustration leaked into her voice, with herself, with my question, with life in general maybe. She began to pace frenetically.
"Bella, what is this between us? What do you want it to be? What do you want to happen between us?"
She wrung her hands as she sank down onto the step, shaking with adrenaline.
"I don't want to hurt you, Sam, and I don't want to be hurt again. Paul reminded me that I always hurt everyone that cares about me. I can't live through another person I love leaving me, Sam. So I was going to run. I was going to save us both the pain, I guess. Better to be lonely on my own terms than to be broken again."
I stood up, hurt by her words.
“You think I can handle you leaving? I nearly fucking died when I lost Emily." Anger sharpened my words before I dropped my head and whispered, “I can't survive another loss."
Her temper snapped and she jumped up again as she nearly yelled back at me, "And I can? What happens when the pack gets to you, Sam? When you decide that Paul's right? Jesus Christ! Do you think I've forgotten where I stand in the pecking order here? When Jake phased, I became nothing overnight. I will not open myself up to that again. Paul made it very clear that opinions have not changed and I will never be anything but the "leech lover," her voice caught in painful remembrance of her past before carrying on. "I can't live every day wondering when you’re going to realize it for yourself."
She slumped in sorrow, her head dropping to rest on her knees.
With a growl I began to pace again, only to stop as I spoke. "Fuck, Bella! You’re going to sit there and tell me, you don't feel this connection we have? I don't know what it is, but I will be damned if I let you walk out of my life before we at least find out what the hell it is!"
Passion and fury were strong in my eyes as I took a step towards her.
She stared back at me, eyes blazing as her own fury overtook her, hissing out at me. "Of course I want to fucking know! Why the fuck do you think I came back?" She marched to me, jabbing a finger in my chest, her own chest heaving with each furious breath she took. "I feel everything, Sam! Everything!"
I let a low growl out and crashed my lips against hers in a fiery passionate kiss, anger and lust fueling the flames consuming us both as her body pressed against the length of mine.
I grasped her ass in my hands and yanked her even closer, my anger quickly becoming a passion that burned just a hot as my anger had only moments earlier. I felt her bite my lower lip, only fueling my need to dominate and claim her. She clung to me, wrapping her legs around my waist and tangling her fingers roughly in my hair while I pressed her back against the wall outside, just next to the door frame. I groaned aloud when I felt her writhe against me, pressing into my cock as she tried to seek friction that she needed.
"Fuck, Sam!"
I took advantage of her hissed oath and thrust my tongue between her parted lips, seeking out every nuance of her sweetness. She struggled for a moment before giving in and swirling her tongue against mine. I couldn't stop from grinding against her, causing both of us to moan.
Somehow in the frenzy to get inside, we both lost our shirts. Eventually, even with frenzied kissing and heated groping, I managed to get us to the guest room.
Panting, I pulled back and quickly removed my pants, my eyes trained on her as she scooted back on the bed and I shook my head.
"Oh no, you don't. You get out of those shorts right now, Baby..I want you."
My voice was strong and thick with lust. I could feel my wolf at the surface, my eyes taking on a yellow tinge as both halves of my persona commanded her.
I wrapped my hands around her ankles and pulled her roughly down the bed back towards me with a throaty snarl. I slid my hand between her thighs, forcing them apart and with a sharp tug, ripped her panties away, causing her to gasp and a wave of thick, ambrosial arousal to coat the air in the room. She was soaking wet and I wasn't going to take it easy on her. I was going to claim her right the fuck now.
I grasped her hips and positioned her small, lithe body over the head of my glistening cock. Her eyes went wide as I sunk her down on me. She was almost painfully tight as I stretched and filled her. I gave her precious little time to adjust before thrusting into her hard. She let out a guttural moan when I begin surging into her. I had no intention of taking this slow.
Hands wrapped firmly around her hips, I pushed and pulled her onto me, still standing as I fucked her. She was moaning every time I sank into her and her walls began to clench at my length, but I was nowhere near done.
With a growl, I pulled out and set her on the bed once again, my voice low and double-timbred, almost the Alpha tone that I hadn’t used in years, as I ordered her, "Turn around and get on your hands and knees."
She glared briefly, but obliged me, moving onto her hands and knees so that her round, perfect ass was thrust towards me in silent invitation.
I thrust my cock back into her folds; the change in position sent my wolf into a frenzy. With one hand wrapped around her hip, I used my free hand to move her hair to the side, exposing her neck. My wolf was salivating as we both eyed the pale creamy skin. She would soon be wearing my mark. Of that, I was absolutely certain.
She reached down and began rubbing her clit, moaning in ecstasy as I pounded into her. "Oh God, Sam...So fucking close, Baby!"
I lost it when she clenched so tight around me that it made me nearly cum. Snarling, I leaned over her back, covering her with my body, and sunk my teeth deep into the back of her neck, my wolf looking on in pride.
Being bitten must have felt as good to her as biting her did to me, because she cried out incoherently and convulsed, drenching my cock as she came forcefully.
I could feel her pulsing and drawing me further into her depths and with a deep growl and roll of my hips, I exploded in her, my release covering her walls, her folds and dripping down her thighs. I slowed my thrusts as we both came down from our initial highs and released my teeth from the bite that I inflicted on her neck, my tongue swirling across it so that it would heal quicker than normal.
Neither of us were ready to talk more, so instead, after lowering her to the bed, we curled up and went back to sleep, resting more comfortably than before.
When we woke, the sun was up but I was still early, we were curled close together in bed when we began talking again. Bella was the first to break the silence.
"Sam...For as long as I can remember I’ve had abandonment issues. They started even before Edward. It took me years to figure that out, and that was only with the help of a counselor. I was a mess after Edward and after Jake. I felt like I had no one left...so I ran. I'm sorry...I thought it was best then and then last night when Paul played on those emotions…I didn't and don't want to hurt you, but he seems to think that I will."
I sucked in a breath at her words, contemplating them before I allowed myself to speak, my voice thickened with emotion. "No more running Bella...you can't do that to me or your dad, or anyone else for that matter. You need to stay and talk through any problems that arise. Understood?" My voice lowered but stayed in a commanding tone as I told her what I needed from her. "Whatever this is between us, Bella..it is strong and if you were to try to leave, it would devastate us both...I can't do that again dammit." I swore as my eyes misted.
"I promise..Sam, I will try to talk my problems through, instead of running." She spoke softly to me and with earnest sincerity pressing her small body closer to mine, giving me hope that she understood and meant what she said.
"Bella...if this is going to work, you have to talk to me..open up to me. I’ll do the same for you."
She bit her lip and sighed softly, her shoulders slumping some. "I know, Sam. It’s so many things that just piled on one after another." I nodded and waited for her to continue, just as she had for me the night before.
When she spoke again, her voice took on a hollow tone, devastated almost. "I didn't have the best home life, I had to learn how to take care of managing a household by the time I was 10. I had to pay the bills, buy the groceries. Renee was so flighty and harebrained that she more times than not forgot to take care of those things. I had to grow up quickly, because she was more like the kid and I was more like the adult in our relationship. Charlie…well, he had a hard time, too. From longing for a woman that doesn't want him, to his inability to find someone else that he wants to settle down with. Their divorce made me fear commitment, to be honest. I hate that I feel that way, but I am trying." She looked at me as she spoke, her breath hitching, tears glistening in her eyes. It was then that I knew that what she was about to reveal was hard for her, even now.
"Then there was Edward. When we first met, the physical attraction as well as the draw that we felt towards one another was intense. He tried to stay away from me, but he couldn't and I was intrigued by him. Our relationship was doomed to fail, I can see that now... not because he was a vampire and I was human, but because he was stuck in his ways far too much. There would always be this ravine between us. Nothing could have changed that, but when he left, it truly destroyed me. I know you were the one to find me. I...well, thank you for that.”
“He told me… that we didn't belong together, that he was tired of pretending. Everything he said that day ripped my heart to shreds. I felt so lost without him, without his family. I felt like I was nothing, and that I had nothing left. It was stupid for me to feel that way, when I had Charlie and Renee both still living and breathing. I know if I had died, whether it had been from becoming a vampire or of natural means, they would have missed me terribly. It took months before I began to feel normal again," She swallowed and took a steadying breath, her eyes meeting mine as she continued on.
"Jake was the biggest help when I was lost within myself. He picked the pieces up like a puzzle and put me back together again. Our friendship was growing. If things had not changed, if he had not become a spirit warrior..a Qwoli, he and I might have become more than just friends. But he phased and ended our friendship. That was the final straw for me. I stayed long enough to complete my classes early, then made my way south. I ended up working my way down, stopping and working at diners until one day I found myself in San Francisco.”
“I loved the city; it brought me comfort that I was in such a big place that I could get lost and be no one, to be noticed by no one. I started enrolling in classes at UC Davis, randomly taking whatever I wanted to start with. Then I met someone who really made me think hard about what I wanted to do with my life. They were my mentor and still are. Without them, I would still be wandering around the US no doubt." She smiled wanly as she spoke of this person, whoever it was, had to be very special to her.
She rested her hand on mine after finishing telling me all of this and I squeezed softly, knowing it must have been hard to expose some of her inner doubts and pain.
"You asked why I ran. I hate to inflict pain on others, intentional or not. Paul's words last night sent me spinning right back towards that." Her voice thickened as she struggled to continue to speak. "I am afraid that I will hurt you… and if I did Sam, I couldn't bear it."
Each fear that she had was mine as well, our bond was already stronger than anything I had known. Unable to speak, I gathered her in my arms and just held her as she cried softly, letting go of her past.
We stayed like that for a while; time did not hold any meaning in those moments. She kissed my cheek as she wiped her tears and took a shuddering breath, whispering hoarsely, "Thank you, Sam. I needed that, I really did. I am going to get ready; I need to go see my dad." She offered a small smile and went to take a shower.
By the time she came out, I had decided I was going to speak to Paul.
"Take my truck, Bella, I am staying in La Push today."
With a smile, she leaned up and brushed her lips against mine, whispering a ‘see you later’ as she headed out the door and took off in my truck to go see Charlie.
I watched until I could no longer see my truck in the distance, then heaving a sigh, I took off to Paul's house.
I stared at the cracked, peeling paint on his door and raised my hand to knock. I paused halfway, wanting to put this off, but couldn't really. Again, I raised my fist to the door and knocked. He opened the door just a fraction, glancing at me with a snort.
"What can I do for you, Alpha?" he muttered. I could hear Rachel in there somewhere moving around.
His attitude awaked my rage all over again. I grasped him by his shoulders and slammed his back against the wall.
"You and I need to talk, Paul."
I held him there, shaking in anger, hissing at him, "What the fuck, Paul? You need to stay the fuck out of my business! Whatever this thing is between Bella and me is just that, between me and Bella. You stay the hell away from her!" I dropped him from my hold and took a step back, anger still my predominant emotion. I was just waiting for this shithead to push me.
He snorted and folded his arms across his chest, raising a brow as he took in my words.
"Sam, come on now, it’s the leech lover. She could be leading those fucking leeches right back here."
I glared and shook my head before dropping my voice in a warning tone.
"Listen, fucker... I am a grown man. You and the pack have to let me see where this goes. Alright?" My tone getting harder at the end, wanting to make sure he understood my point.
He was about to say something that, which I am sure was going to piss me off even more, when my cell phone went off. Casting a quick glance at it, I scowled but answered in a gruff tone, "Officer Uley speaking."
What I heard next made my blood run cold and shook me to the core of my being with fear.
"Sam, we need you to come down here on the 110, your truck has crashed into a tree, the woman driving it, Isabella Swan, has been taken to the hospital."
Everything seemed to be closing in on me as I fought to stay in control, with my throat tightening; I managed to choke out that I'd be there as soon as possible. My body was trembling and I could feel my wolf whining at the news of the accident. With one look at Paul, I simply growled out as I walked towards his truck, "You’re driving." My voice was firm and edged with the alpha command.
He glared but nodded, the tension running high as I went to his truck and heard him speaking quietly to Rachel, her body outlined in the door frame as she peered around him towards me. His words to her reflected his passion and the man he had become since she had walked into his life.
I could feel his eyes on me as he drove us, but he didn't speak. I shook slightly. With each passing second the need to get to Bella grew. A low lupine sound escaped my throat as I clenched my fists and murmured to Paul, "Fucking step on it!"
The scenery flashed by as Paul sped down the 110 to get to the scene of the accident. His hands grasped the steering wheel so tightly that it left his usually copper skin white around his knuckles. I was hunched over, my fingernails digging into my palms while my thoughts ran rampant with every possible situation I could think of. I was scared shitless that I would lose Bella, but deep down, my instincts told me that she would be alright.
Paul pulled up to scene of the accident and I saw the Fork's P.D. car was there and one of my co-workers was heading the cleanup.
"Wayne? What the fuck happened?" I questioned the head officer here.
He explained that apparently Bella had nearly collided with a deer and ran off the road and right into a tree. He then quickly assured me that Bella was alright, just a little shaken up. The ambulance took her to Forks Hospital just for observation.
A small amount of relief flooded me, but I was narrowly pushing not losing it and phasing in front of my co-workers. After signing the proper forms to have my truck towed to Jake's auto shop, I got back in the truck with Paul to head to the Forks Hospital. No words were spoken, a constant growl was rumbling in my chest at the asshole sitting next to me.
After observing me some more, I heard him speak gruffly, “You really do have a connection with her, don't you?"
I just nodded, unable to speak for fear if I did, I would either phase in the damn truck or say something that would piss him off.
Finally after what felt like hours, he pulled up to Forks General and trailed behind me as I made my way to the E.R. Instead of going to the nurses’ station, I followed my nose, scenting her out and leaving Paul to his own devices. Fuck protocol, I needed my woman and I needed her now!
I could hear him speaking quietly to the nurses, trying to smooth things over in my wake as I entered Bella's room. Unable to speak just yet, I went right to her and folded my arms around her, pulling her into my chest.
She murmured as she slid her arms around my neck, pulling me onto the bed with her, "Ssssh Sam, I'm okay...we're okay."
It was a few minutes later and I had Bella wrapped in my arms, holding her close for fear still of losing her, when Paul made his way into the room.
He opened his mouth to speak, but was quieted when I growled at him, my face contorting into a sneer. My growl was eased by my girl's hands pressing against both of my cheeks, making me turn my head to face her as she whispered, "Sam, let him speak."
I nodded mutely and glanced towards Paul, nodding for him to speak.
He shuffled his feet minutely and in a mumble, keeping his head down, spoke, "I'm sorry, Bella..for everything." His apology encompassing not just the recent events, I could tell, but the past ones too.
I turned my attention away from Paul, back to Bella, her gaze meeting mine steadily, a slight smile tugged at her lips. "Apology accepted?"
I held her gaze, my own lips forming a grin, knowing Paul was watching us with interest, but I couldn’t care less. "Yeah...it is."
Sam POV
I lay with her in my arms in the dark of the guest room, thinking she looked so beautiful asleep with her hair spread over the pillow like a halo. I couldn’t help the anger that was simmering just beneath the surface of my psyche, however. Yet again it seemed Bella Swan had tried to run instead of facing her problems. Things were different this time though. It wasn’t just her heart that would be broken if she left; this time my heart would go with her and I couldn’t handle another loss, not at her hands or anyone else's. Paul, well he was another matter altogether. He and I were going to have to settle a few fucking things. I was a grown fucking man and could make my own decisions without his interference.
I moved away from Bella and got up when I couldn’t hold back the growl any longer. My movement caused her to stir some but not wake, for which I was thankful. I knew I needed to discuss some things with her, but I needed a little time to gather my thoughts. Last night had left me emotionally overwrought and I didn’t want to say something I’d regret later. I drifted into the kitchen, needing to some coffee. I knew it wouldn't be long before she would be up and I wanted the time alone and caffeine before I had to face her. Once the coffee had brewed, I grabbed a cup, tossing some creamer into it, and went to sit outside on my porch.
I was staring out into the forest, lost in my own thoughts, when I heard Bella began to stir. It wasn't long before her footsteps came up behind me and she spoke softly.
"Morning, Sam."
I nodded in acknowledgement, my gaze still turned towards the forest as I finished off my coffee.
"Morning, Bella."
It was a moment before she spoke up again, tension thick in her voice.
"I'm sorry for last night…about Paul."
I slowly shifted my gaze towards her, almost coldly. I needed answers. I was angry and hurt.
"Why Bella? What made you want to run? You always seem to run when the going gets tough."
"I run, Sam. It's what I do. Damn it! I don't even know what I am running from! From you? Us? This place? Whatever the hell this is between us?"
Frustration leaked into her voice, with herself, with my question, with life in general maybe. She began to pace frenetically.
"Bella, what is this between us? What do you want it to be? What do you want to happen between us?"
She wrung her hands as she sank down onto the step, shaking with adrenaline.
"I don't want to hurt you, Sam, and I don't want to be hurt again. Paul reminded me that I always hurt everyone that cares about me. I can't live through another person I love leaving me, Sam. So I was going to run. I was going to save us both the pain, I guess. Better to be lonely on my own terms than to be broken again."
I stood up, hurt by her words.
“You think I can handle you leaving? I nearly fucking died when I lost Emily." Anger sharpened my words before I dropped my head and whispered, “I can't survive another loss."
Her temper snapped and she jumped up again as she nearly yelled back at me, "And I can? What happens when the pack gets to you, Sam? When you decide that Paul's right? Jesus Christ! Do you think I've forgotten where I stand in the pecking order here? When Jake phased, I became nothing overnight. I will not open myself up to that again. Paul made it very clear that opinions have not changed and I will never be anything but the "leech lover," her voice caught in painful remembrance of her past before carrying on. "I can't live every day wondering when you’re going to realize it for yourself."
She slumped in sorrow, her head dropping to rest on her knees.
With a growl I began to pace again, only to stop as I spoke. "Fuck, Bella! You’re going to sit there and tell me, you don't feel this connection we have? I don't know what it is, but I will be damned if I let you walk out of my life before we at least find out what the hell it is!"
Passion and fury were strong in my eyes as I took a step towards her.
She stared back at me, eyes blazing as her own fury overtook her, hissing out at me. "Of course I want to fucking know! Why the fuck do you think I came back?" She marched to me, jabbing a finger in my chest, her own chest heaving with each furious breath she took. "I feel everything, Sam! Everything!"
I let a low growl out and crashed my lips against hers in a fiery passionate kiss, anger and lust fueling the flames consuming us both as her body pressed against the length of mine.
I grasped her ass in my hands and yanked her even closer, my anger quickly becoming a passion that burned just a hot as my anger had only moments earlier. I felt her bite my lower lip, only fueling my need to dominate and claim her. She clung to me, wrapping her legs around my waist and tangling her fingers roughly in my hair while I pressed her back against the wall outside, just next to the door frame. I groaned aloud when I felt her writhe against me, pressing into my cock as she tried to seek friction that she needed.
"Fuck, Sam!"
I took advantage of her hissed oath and thrust my tongue between her parted lips, seeking out every nuance of her sweetness. She struggled for a moment before giving in and swirling her tongue against mine. I couldn't stop from grinding against her, causing both of us to moan.
Somehow in the frenzy to get inside, we both lost our shirts. Eventually, even with frenzied kissing and heated groping, I managed to get us to the guest room.
Panting, I pulled back and quickly removed my pants, my eyes trained on her as she scooted back on the bed and I shook my head.
"Oh no, you don't. You get out of those shorts right now, Baby..I want you."
My voice was strong and thick with lust. I could feel my wolf at the surface, my eyes taking on a yellow tinge as both halves of my persona commanded her.
I wrapped my hands around her ankles and pulled her roughly down the bed back towards me with a throaty snarl. I slid my hand between her thighs, forcing them apart and with a sharp tug, ripped her panties away, causing her to gasp and a wave of thick, ambrosial arousal to coat the air in the room. She was soaking wet and I wasn't going to take it easy on her. I was going to claim her right the fuck now.
I grasped her hips and positioned her small, lithe body over the head of my glistening cock. Her eyes went wide as I sunk her down on me. She was almost painfully tight as I stretched and filled her. I gave her precious little time to adjust before thrusting into her hard. She let out a guttural moan when I begin surging into her. I had no intention of taking this slow.
Hands wrapped firmly around her hips, I pushed and pulled her onto me, still standing as I fucked her. She was moaning every time I sank into her and her walls began to clench at my length, but I was nowhere near done.
With a growl, I pulled out and set her on the bed once again, my voice low and double-timbred, almost the Alpha tone that I hadn’t used in years, as I ordered her, "Turn around and get on your hands and knees."
She glared briefly, but obliged me, moving onto her hands and knees so that her round, perfect ass was thrust towards me in silent invitation.
I thrust my cock back into her folds; the change in position sent my wolf into a frenzy. With one hand wrapped around her hip, I used my free hand to move her hair to the side, exposing her neck. My wolf was salivating as we both eyed the pale creamy skin. She would soon be wearing my mark. Of that, I was absolutely certain.
She reached down and began rubbing her clit, moaning in ecstasy as I pounded into her. "Oh God, Sam...So fucking close, Baby!"
I lost it when she clenched so tight around me that it made me nearly cum. Snarling, I leaned over her back, covering her with my body, and sunk my teeth deep into the back of her neck, my wolf looking on in pride.
Being bitten must have felt as good to her as biting her did to me, because she cried out incoherently and convulsed, drenching my cock as she came forcefully.
I could feel her pulsing and drawing me further into her depths and with a deep growl and roll of my hips, I exploded in her, my release covering her walls, her folds and dripping down her thighs. I slowed my thrusts as we both came down from our initial highs and released my teeth from the bite that I inflicted on her neck, my tongue swirling across it so that it would heal quicker than normal.
Neither of us were ready to talk more, so instead, after lowering her to the bed, we curled up and went back to sleep, resting more comfortably than before.
When we woke, the sun was up but I was still early, we were curled close together in bed when we began talking again. Bella was the first to break the silence.
"Sam...For as long as I can remember I’ve had abandonment issues. They started even before Edward. It took me years to figure that out, and that was only with the help of a counselor. I was a mess after Edward and after Jake. I felt like I had no one left...so I ran. I'm sorry...I thought it was best then and then last night when Paul played on those emotions…I didn't and don't want to hurt you, but he seems to think that I will."
I sucked in a breath at her words, contemplating them before I allowed myself to speak, my voice thickened with emotion. "No more running Bella...you can't do that to me or your dad, or anyone else for that matter. You need to stay and talk through any problems that arise. Understood?" My voice lowered but stayed in a commanding tone as I told her what I needed from her. "Whatever this is between us, Bella..it is strong and if you were to try to leave, it would devastate us both...I can't do that again dammit." I swore as my eyes misted.
"I promise..Sam, I will try to talk my problems through, instead of running." She spoke softly to me and with earnest sincerity pressing her small body closer to mine, giving me hope that she understood and meant what she said.
"Bella...if this is going to work, you have to talk to me..open up to me. I’ll do the same for you."
She bit her lip and sighed softly, her shoulders slumping some. "I know, Sam. It’s so many things that just piled on one after another." I nodded and waited for her to continue, just as she had for me the night before.
When she spoke again, her voice took on a hollow tone, devastated almost. "I didn't have the best home life, I had to learn how to take care of managing a household by the time I was 10. I had to pay the bills, buy the groceries. Renee was so flighty and harebrained that she more times than not forgot to take care of those things. I had to grow up quickly, because she was more like the kid and I was more like the adult in our relationship. Charlie…well, he had a hard time, too. From longing for a woman that doesn't want him, to his inability to find someone else that he wants to settle down with. Their divorce made me fear commitment, to be honest. I hate that I feel that way, but I am trying." She looked at me as she spoke, her breath hitching, tears glistening in her eyes. It was then that I knew that what she was about to reveal was hard for her, even now.
"Then there was Edward. When we first met, the physical attraction as well as the draw that we felt towards one another was intense. He tried to stay away from me, but he couldn't and I was intrigued by him. Our relationship was doomed to fail, I can see that now... not because he was a vampire and I was human, but because he was stuck in his ways far too much. There would always be this ravine between us. Nothing could have changed that, but when he left, it truly destroyed me. I know you were the one to find me. I...well, thank you for that.”
“He told me… that we didn't belong together, that he was tired of pretending. Everything he said that day ripped my heart to shreds. I felt so lost without him, without his family. I felt like I was nothing, and that I had nothing left. It was stupid for me to feel that way, when I had Charlie and Renee both still living and breathing. I know if I had died, whether it had been from becoming a vampire or of natural means, they would have missed me terribly. It took months before I began to feel normal again," She swallowed and took a steadying breath, her eyes meeting mine as she continued on.
"Jake was the biggest help when I was lost within myself. He picked the pieces up like a puzzle and put me back together again. Our friendship was growing. If things had not changed, if he had not become a spirit warrior..a Qwoli, he and I might have become more than just friends. But he phased and ended our friendship. That was the final straw for me. I stayed long enough to complete my classes early, then made my way south. I ended up working my way down, stopping and working at diners until one day I found myself in San Francisco.”
“I loved the city; it brought me comfort that I was in such a big place that I could get lost and be no one, to be noticed by no one. I started enrolling in classes at UC Davis, randomly taking whatever I wanted to start with. Then I met someone who really made me think hard about what I wanted to do with my life. They were my mentor and still are. Without them, I would still be wandering around the US no doubt." She smiled wanly as she spoke of this person, whoever it was, had to be very special to her.
She rested her hand on mine after finishing telling me all of this and I squeezed softly, knowing it must have been hard to expose some of her inner doubts and pain.
"You asked why I ran. I hate to inflict pain on others, intentional or not. Paul's words last night sent me spinning right back towards that." Her voice thickened as she struggled to continue to speak. "I am afraid that I will hurt you… and if I did Sam, I couldn't bear it."
Each fear that she had was mine as well, our bond was already stronger than anything I had known. Unable to speak, I gathered her in my arms and just held her as she cried softly, letting go of her past.
We stayed like that for a while; time did not hold any meaning in those moments. She kissed my cheek as she wiped her tears and took a shuddering breath, whispering hoarsely, "Thank you, Sam. I needed that, I really did. I am going to get ready; I need to go see my dad." She offered a small smile and went to take a shower.
By the time she came out, I had decided I was going to speak to Paul.
"Take my truck, Bella, I am staying in La Push today."
With a smile, she leaned up and brushed her lips against mine, whispering a ‘see you later’ as she headed out the door and took off in my truck to go see Charlie.
I watched until I could no longer see my truck in the distance, then heaving a sigh, I took off to Paul's house.
I stared at the cracked, peeling paint on his door and raised my hand to knock. I paused halfway, wanting to put this off, but couldn't really. Again, I raised my fist to the door and knocked. He opened the door just a fraction, glancing at me with a snort.
"What can I do for you, Alpha?" he muttered. I could hear Rachel in there somewhere moving around.
His attitude awaked my rage all over again. I grasped him by his shoulders and slammed his back against the wall.
"You and I need to talk, Paul."
I held him there, shaking in anger, hissing at him, "What the fuck, Paul? You need to stay the fuck out of my business! Whatever this thing is between Bella and me is just that, between me and Bella. You stay the hell away from her!" I dropped him from my hold and took a step back, anger still my predominant emotion. I was just waiting for this shithead to push me.
He snorted and folded his arms across his chest, raising a brow as he took in my words.
"Sam, come on now, it’s the leech lover. She could be leading those fucking leeches right back here."
I glared and shook my head before dropping my voice in a warning tone.
"Listen, fucker... I am a grown man. You and the pack have to let me see where this goes. Alright?" My tone getting harder at the end, wanting to make sure he understood my point.
He was about to say something that, which I am sure was going to piss me off even more, when my cell phone went off. Casting a quick glance at it, I scowled but answered in a gruff tone, "Officer Uley speaking."
What I heard next made my blood run cold and shook me to the core of my being with fear.
"Sam, we need you to come down here on the 110, your truck has crashed into a tree, the woman driving it, Isabella Swan, has been taken to the hospital."
Everything seemed to be closing in on me as I fought to stay in control, with my throat tightening; I managed to choke out that I'd be there as soon as possible. My body was trembling and I could feel my wolf whining at the news of the accident. With one look at Paul, I simply growled out as I walked towards his truck, "You’re driving." My voice was firm and edged with the alpha command.
He glared but nodded, the tension running high as I went to his truck and heard him speaking quietly to Rachel, her body outlined in the door frame as she peered around him towards me. His words to her reflected his passion and the man he had become since she had walked into his life.
I could feel his eyes on me as he drove us, but he didn't speak. I shook slightly. With each passing second the need to get to Bella grew. A low lupine sound escaped my throat as I clenched my fists and murmured to Paul, "Fucking step on it!"
The scenery flashed by as Paul sped down the 110 to get to the scene of the accident. His hands grasped the steering wheel so tightly that it left his usually copper skin white around his knuckles. I was hunched over, my fingernails digging into my palms while my thoughts ran rampant with every possible situation I could think of. I was scared shitless that I would lose Bella, but deep down, my instincts told me that she would be alright.
Paul pulled up to scene of the accident and I saw the Fork's P.D. car was there and one of my co-workers was heading the cleanup.
"Wayne? What the fuck happened?" I questioned the head officer here.
He explained that apparently Bella had nearly collided with a deer and ran off the road and right into a tree. He then quickly assured me that Bella was alright, just a little shaken up. The ambulance took her to Forks Hospital just for observation.
A small amount of relief flooded me, but I was narrowly pushing not losing it and phasing in front of my co-workers. After signing the proper forms to have my truck towed to Jake's auto shop, I got back in the truck with Paul to head to the Forks Hospital. No words were spoken, a constant growl was rumbling in my chest at the asshole sitting next to me.
After observing me some more, I heard him speak gruffly, “You really do have a connection with her, don't you?"
I just nodded, unable to speak for fear if I did, I would either phase in the damn truck or say something that would piss him off.
Finally after what felt like hours, he pulled up to Forks General and trailed behind me as I made my way to the E.R. Instead of going to the nurses’ station, I followed my nose, scenting her out and leaving Paul to his own devices. Fuck protocol, I needed my woman and I needed her now!
I could hear him speaking quietly to the nurses, trying to smooth things over in my wake as I entered Bella's room. Unable to speak just yet, I went right to her and folded my arms around her, pulling her into my chest.
She murmured as she slid her arms around my neck, pulling me onto the bed with her, "Ssssh Sam, I'm okay...we're okay."
It was a few minutes later and I had Bella wrapped in my arms, holding her close for fear still of losing her, when Paul made his way into the room.
He opened his mouth to speak, but was quieted when I growled at him, my face contorting into a sneer. My growl was eased by my girl's hands pressing against both of my cheeks, making me turn my head to face her as she whispered, "Sam, let him speak."
I nodded mutely and glanced towards Paul, nodding for him to speak.
He shuffled his feet minutely and in a mumble, keeping his head down, spoke, "I'm sorry, Bella..for everything." His apology encompassing not just the recent events, I could tell, but the past ones too.
I turned my attention away from Paul, back to Bella, her gaze meeting mine steadily, a slight smile tugged at her lips. "Apology accepted?"
I held her gaze, my own lips forming a grin, knowing Paul was watching us with interest, but I couldn’t care less. "Yeah...it is."