Breathe In Union
by Laura Spudzmom
Chapter 05
~ Jambi ~
So if I could I'd wish it all away.
If I thought tomorrow would take you away.
You're my peace of mind, my home, my center.
I'm just trying to hold on,
One more day.
~o0o~
After dinner and clean up, they moved into the living room and Paul sat on the couch while Bella opened the movie cabinet. "What do you feel like watching," she asked as she perused the titles. When he didn't answer, she looked over her shoulder to see him staring at her with a wicked smirk. "Paul?"
"I'm watching it," he said as he met her eyes and she smirked back.
"You really are a bad boy aren't you?"
He grinned. "I have my moments."
She turned back to the cabinet with a smile and said, "Okay, be serious. Pick a movie." She stepped out of the way and he leaned forward to get a better look. "300," he said after a moment and she grabbed it and put it on.
He reached over and turned off the lamp as she sat next to him. "Getting cozy there Lofty?"
He smirked as he put his arm around her and pulled her close. "Makes it easier to see the screen Shorty; nothing nefarious about it." After a moment, he leaned down and brushed his lips over hers as he murmured, "Then again, I should really get all this outta my system before you're under Charlie's gu… uh, protection."
She laughed softly against his smiling lips. "Is that so?" she whispered.
He gently pushed her back to lay on the couch as he followed, a wicked glint in his eyes as he settled over her, his lips hovering over hers.
She sighed and opened to him eagerly as he continued his kisses, some light and gentle, others stealing her breath with passion as his tongue delved deeply and his luscious lips sucked at hers.
"God, I love the way you feel against me…" He groaned as he ground his hips against her center. "…the way you taste… your scent… everything…" he whispered between kisses he left in a teasing path down her neck.
She arched into him, wanting… needing… "Paul," she breathed. Before she was even aware what she was doing, she'd buried one hand in his hair, wrapped a leg around his waist, and moaned lowly as she sought to pull him impossibly closer.
As his kisses continued, she was only vaguely aware of the movement of his hand. It slowly slid up the outside of her leg, where he paused to gently squeeze her hip and then her waist… Slowly, so slowly, he traced up her ribcage where it finally settled in a gentle but firm caress of her breast. As his thumb brushed over her clothed nipple, it ignited a longing in her center she'd never felt before, and she arched into his touch with a gasp of pleasure.
Her mind reeled with these new and overwhelming feelings and she found herself a bit scared at how easy it would be to succumb to them. Her body definitely wanted to… This new ache in her center practically demanded to be sated… filled… and she knew instinctively he could fulfill this ache he'd ignited.
Still, she knew, on a more conscious level, she needed to regain control. She wasn't ready for this. They weren't ready for this, and so she pushed against his chest. "Paul," she said lowly, "…we have to stop."
To her relief—and if she were being honest—disappointment, he did, and he drew back to look into her eyes. With gentle fingers, he traced the outline of her face as a small smile curved his lips. "You're right Shorty. I'm sorry for taking it so far."
She cupped his cheek. "Hey, I was in this too ya know. But I don't think we're ready. I think it would hurt what we have right now, rather than help it, ya know?"
He sat back and pulled her into his lap as his fingers ran through her hair. She laid her head against his shoulder as he spoke. "You're right Bella. I want more for us and you deserve better than a quickie on your mother's couch."
They sat quietly for a while after that, half-way watching the movie, but mostly just enjoying being together. Finally, Bella broke the comfortable silence and spoke. "So, tell me about your dreams. What do you see yourself doing in life?"
He smiled as their eyes met. "That's easy—baseball—pitching specifically. I wanna make it to the majors and I've worked my ass off to make that happen." He glanced down at her. "You know, Charlie has a lot to do with that."
"Yeah?" she questioned.
He nodded. "Yeah, my mom was great, but she was always busy getting her real estate license and then developing her career, so he sort of took me under his wing when I was fourteen. Never let me get down on myself. Never left me idle. If he had the time, he was always there, taking me fishing, or to the indoor batting and pitching cages."
She looked up. "I guess indoor would be a necessity in Forks."
"Yeah," he said with a chuckle. "All the damn rain kinda makes baseball a rare sport for kids around there. That's why I know if it hadn't been for Charlie, I wouldn't be as good as I am today." He stared off into the distance as he continued. "And I mean that in more ways than one."
"Well," she said with a sad sigh, "…at least my boyfriend has a good relationship with my dad."
He tightened his hold on her just a bit as he spoke. "He loves you very much Shorty. He was always talking about you and how proud he was of you." He looked down with a sad smile. "Honestly, there were times I used to get kinda jealous, wishing I had that."
She sat up to meet his eyes. "It sounds to me like you did have that from him Paul. If there's one thing I know about Charlie, it's that he doesn't know how to express himself, face to face with words. He chooses deeds instead. He must love you a lot to do the things he did."
She watched as tears filled Paul's eyes before he turned his head and cleared his throat. "Thanks for sayin' that Shorty, because… I—love Charlie way more than I ever loved my old man. He's the best man I've ever known and I'm glad that he'll have you for a while at least. I know it'll mean the world to him."
Now Bella's eyes filled with tears, and she laid her head back on his shoulder. "I'd say we're both lucky to have him, and I'm glad we found each other Paul."
"Me too Shorty," he murmured. "Me too."
~o0o~
Bella was once again standing in front of her open closet, trying to figure out what to wear. She had lots of nice things to choose from, mostly due to Renee's insistence. She really hated shopping, after all, but now she found herself thankful because she was getting ready to go on her first official date.
After the movie the night before, Paul had called Rudy to pick him up and then had formally asked her out on a date, a first for both of them.
He'd be here in an hour to pick her up, so she wanted to finish getting ready and then call Charlie. It had been too late to bother him last night after Paul had left.
Finally grabbing some linen shorts and a tank with a white, lacy over-shirt, she got dressed, ran a brush through her hair and sat at her desk.
She was nervous. What if he didn't want her there? Would he really, at this late date, want to deal with having her in his home and life? She just wasn't sure, and there was only one way to resolve it, so she picked up her phone and dialed.
"Chief Swan here," he answered and she felt like her heart was in her throat.
"Dad?" she said tentatively. "It's me—Bella. How are you?"
"Bells? Hey, it's great to hear from you kid. I'm doing fine, how are you? What have you been up to?"
"Just the usual really, but dad? I kinda called for a reason. Now, I don't want you to feel obligated—you can say no, and I'll totally understand…" She trailed off when he cut in.
"Whoa, slow down kid. Now, what can I do? It sounds like you need something…"
"Yeah dad… I want to come live with you for my last year of school."
There was silence on the line for a moment and she cringed at what he might be thinking. Finally, he spoke after clearing his throat.
"Sure Bells, I'd love to have you here. There's always been a place for you here kid."
She felt tears prick her eyes. "You sure dad? I won't cramp your style or anything?"
He chuckled. "My style? Uh, no kid. No style to cramp I'm afraid."
"That's great dad… Uh, I mean it's great you'll have me there, not the no style part."
"I know what ya meant kid," he said with amusement apparent in his voice. "So when can I expect you?"
She kind of froze at the question. When indeed? She'd have to see when Paul was leaving because she didn't want to miss any time with him.
"Uh, can I get back to you with a date dad? I mean, I know I need to be there before school starts, but I have some stuff to take care of here first."
"Sure Bells, that's fine. Just have your records sent to Forks High and I'll stop by there and take care of the rest."
"Thanks dad," she murmured as her heart ached. Why hadn't she considered this move sooner? So much wasted time…
"No problem. Was there something else you wanted to talk about?"
She thought of Paul briefly, but shook her head. "No dad, that was it."
"Okay then kid. Just call me with the date and flight info. I'll be there to pick you up."
"All right dad, thanks. I'll talk to you later."
"Sure Bells, bye."
"Bye." She pressed end and stared at her phone for a moment. That had been much easier than she'd thought it would, and she had to admit to feeling regret over how she'd disregarded him the past few years especially with all that Paul had told her.
Giving herself a mental shake, she tossed her phone in her bag, zipped it and headed down stairs to wait for Paul.
When she got down there, her mother was in the living room with Phil and they were watching a movie. She walked in and sat in the chair next to them.
"Hi baby," Renee said. "Wow, you look great. Going somewhere?"
"Yeah, Paul's picking me up for a date in a few."
Renee grinned. "Oooh, tell me about it. Where's he taking you?"
Bella shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know. He didn't say. He just said we'd be there most of the day and to dress comfortably, so I'm guessing it's nothing fancy, thank god."
Just then, the door bell rang and she grabbed her bag and walked out as she called a goodbye over her shoulder.
When she opened the door, she smiled at the sight of Paul, standing there with his signature smirk and a red rose in hand which he presented to her. "For my lovely date."
She stepped out and closed the door as she looked into his eyes. "Does it come with a kiss, because if not, I don't want it."
He reached out and drew her close. "Of course. Never let it be said I disappointed my girl."
With that, he leaned down and kissed her softly. When he drew away, she opened her eyes and said, "You're so good at that."
"You're not so bad yourself," he said with a grin. "But come on. We better leave now before that wall behind you sees some serious action."
He took her hand and walked her to the car where he opened the door for her. "Wow, full service and everything," she said as she got in.
He walked around and slid into the drivers seat. "Hey, I said I didn't date, not that I didn't know how to."
He started the car and pulled out into the street. "Nice car." she said. "It's Rudy's, right?"
He nodded as he propped an arm by the window. "Yeah, he can afford it because he still lives at home."
"Well, lots of people his age still live at home," she said with a shrug.
"I don't know," he said as he glanced at her. "I could see it if he was going to school or something, but he's got a full time job." He shrugged. "All I know is that I don't wanna be living on the rez when I'm his age. I can't wait to get outta there, ya know? Do more with my life than staying there would allow."
She nodded. "I can't say I disagree. I mean, I've been looking forward to independence for a while now. It'll be nice to finally be doing something for me; for my life."
"Exactly!" he said as he pulled in to a crowded parking lot. "There are so many people in our tribe who never leave the rez. They're born there, live their lives there and they die there and, to me, the prospect of that is depressing. I've often wondered why they do it, but I've never asked any of them. Most of the old-timers are cryptic bastards anyway, so I'm sure I wouldn't get a straight answer even if I did ask."
Bella chuckled as he cut the engine. "Sounds like that old lady that gave me this," and she held up her wrist.
"Yeah," he said as he undid the seat belt and opened the door. "Imagine dealing with several like her for most of your life."
He came around and opened her door and she got out and looked around as he locked the car. "An amusement park?" she asked with a grin.
"Yeah," he answered as he took her hand and they began walking. "Please tell me you like roller coasters."
She looked up at him with a grimace and he cocked a brow. "Well, to be honest, they scare the shit outta me…" She trailed off when he dropped his head and she rushed on. "But—I have you to hang on to, so it's all good."
He eyed her skeptically as they walked. "You're gonna hate this date aren't ya Shorty?"
She stopped and he turned to face her as she scowled up at him. "No. I'm with you and it'll be great. Now don't go getting emo on me 'cause then I'll have to find a way to kick your ass."
He stared at her for a beat before he cracked up laughing. "Fuck," he said as he tugged her along. "I think I'd like to see that Shorty."
"No you wouldn't," she said with conviction. "I can be very mean when I set my mind to it."
He slung an arm around her shoulders. "I don't doubt it." He grinned down at her. "I'd still like to witness it."
He already had the tickets, so they went straight to the gate and made their way inside. He pointed at the biggest coaster Bella'd ever seen. "How about that one first?
Bella stared. The thing had no less than three loops, plus a wicked looking cork-screw portion, and she swallowed thickly as she looked up at him. "Okay," she said weakly and they got in line.
When they got off the ride, she was smiling widely. "Holy shit that was fun!" she said as she hung onto his arm.
He smirked. "Somehow, I knew there was a thrill seeker hiding inside you. I could see it in your eyes Shorty. You like danger." He glanced down at her as they got in the next line. "I think that's why I caught your eye."
He pulled her into his arms as he leaned against the hand-rail and she tilted her head to look at him, a thoughtful expression on her face. "You know, I think you're right! I remember thinking that you were beautiful, in a bad boy sort of way the first time I saw you."
He nodded and kissed her quickly. "Yeah? I remember thinking that you were a sweet, good girl with a taste for the dark side," he drawled out in a deep voice.
She laughed and poked his ribs. "I guess we were both right."
"Yeah Shorty," he said as he caressed her cheek. "Looks like we were." They stared at each other and he murmured, "We were made for each other." Then he kissed her, slowly and softly which he only broke when the people behind them cleared their throat.
Bella blushed and they moved up. "So, what do you want for dinner? Most of the stuff here is junk, but I think I saw a couple of decent sit-down places. You wanna do that?" he asked as he looked at the map.
She shrugged as she leaned with her back against him. "Whatever you want. It doesn't have to be expensive."
"Hmm," he said. "There's an Italian place… that good with you?"
She turned and wrapped her arms around him. "Yeah, sounds good."
He folded the map and stuffed it in his pocket before wrapping her in his arms.
"I talked to Charlie," she said and felt him tense.
"And?" he questioned.
"It was easier than I expected. He's just waiting on a date and flight information." She looked up at him. "I wanted to see when you plan on leaving before setting a date for myself."
He moved her hair off her shoulder and kissed just under her ear. "Well," he said as he straightened back up. "I was planning on leaving mid-August so I'd have enough time to get my shit together for college. I can move into the dorm during the last week of August."
"Okay, so I'll arrange to fly out then too." She glanced up at him. "If that's all right with you… I mean, I don't want you to feel like I'm chasing you…"
She trailed off when his fingers covered her lips. "Quit with the insecure crap. I love that you'll be going with me. I wouldn't have it any other way."
They rode the next coaster and by the time they got off, they were both ready for dinner.
On their way to the restaurant, he held her hand and smiled down at her as she gushed about the ride. "I think that one is my favorite so far! We have to hit that one again before we leave."
"Yeah, okay," he laughed. "God, I've created a monster! I'm gonna be begging for mercy before we leave here tonight."
She grinned. "Wouldn't it be great to take a road trip of amusement parks?" She turned and walked backwards to see him. "We should plan one for this summer! What do you think? I have some cash saved, and it would be perfect! Just you and me on the road?"
He grinned and grabbed her before she backed over a bench. "Yeah, that sounds great Shorty, but don't kill yourself falling over a bench first."
"Yeah," she said as she took his arm. "That wouldn't be good." She looked at him. "So, we'll do it? You'll go with me?"
He cocked a brow. "You think you'll still want me around by then?"
"Yeah," she smiled up at him. "I will."
~o0o~
Somehow, they managed to luck out and get a table in a quiet corner of the restaurant. They both enjoyed the food, but the best part, to Bella, was just being together.
They talked quietly through the meal, sharing their hopes and dreams which, unknown to both of them, were expanding in their minds to include the other.
One thing Bella had noticed is that Paul had only mentioned his dad once and that was when he'd said he loved Charlie more. It made her curious and, as they shared a dessert, she finally found the courage to ask about it. "Paul?"
He looked at her as he took a drink of water. "Yeah?"
"Why don't you ever talk about your dad?"
Bella watched as he shut down so fast it was almost breathtaking to behold. His eyes turned cold and hard. His face went blank and the hand that'd been resting next to his water glass trembled noticeably before he clenched it into a fist. He looked away and she could see the muscles in his jaw twitch.
"Paul? You okay? I'm sorry! I'm sorry for bringing it up, I was just—curious," she finished weakly not quite sure how to fix the situation.
He stood abruptly, his chair making a scraping noise on the polished floor. "I'll be right back," he said stiffly before stalking off and Bella stared down at her lap, wondering how it had gone so wrong so quickly. It was as though a switch had been flipped, and it worried her.
When he got back a few minutes later, he didn't look much better and he tossed down cash to cover the check. "Come on," he said tightly. "I need to get you home."
She stood and followed him out of the restaurant and once he'd cleared the doors, she could barely keep up with him. Finally, she found her voice. "Paul, come on, talk to me. You don't have to talk about your dad, I swear not to ask again, but tell me what's going on now. Are you mad at me?"
He stopped and hung his head and she could swear his whole body was shaking. "No Bella," he said, his voice sounding a bit raspy. "I'm not mad at you. I just don't talk about that, and now I don't feel well." He turned his head to look at her finally. "I just really need to get you home so I can get some sleep. I think I might be getting sick or something."
She stepped forward and touched his face and gasped. "God, you're burning up! I'll drive you to your Aunt's house and Rudy can drive me home from there." She rubbed his cheek and his eyes closed.
"God, I feel better when you touch me. It doesn't hurt so bad when you touch me."
She took his hand and tugged. "Come on, there's no way I'm letting you drive if you're that sick, but let's get you home."
He smiled wanly. "Yeah, all right." He pulled her in for a hug and whispered against her hair, "I'm sorry for flipping my shit in there Shorty. It's just… it was bad B—real bad."
"Shh, it's all right," she said as she stroked the back of his neck. "You can tell me about it when you're ready and if that's never, then I accept it. You mean too much to me to lose you over something from your past."
He nodded against her shoulder and she backed away. "Let's go."
When she got him to his Aunt's house, he was shaking and moaning and she was scared for him. She parked, set the brake and ran to the front door where she knocked loudly until Rudy opened the door. One look at her anxious face had his eyes widening. "What happened Bella?"
"It's Paul, Rudy. He's really sick! Come help me with him!"
"Oh shit," he said as he ran out the door. "Bella, go in and get my mom."
She ran inside and found Paul's Aunt in the kitchen. "Hi Bella…"
"Paul's really sick and it seems like he's in pain! Should I just take him to the hospital?"
She watched as the woman's face went blank. "No Bella, I know what to do. Is Rudy helping him inside?"
Bella looked confused. "No hospital? But you didn't see him! He's burning up and it started suddenly! He was fine…"
The woman walked past her. "No hospitals Bella. He'll be fine. I know what to do."
When they walked out of the kitchen, Rudy was just helping Paul through the front door and his mother spoke to him. "Put Paul in bed and then take Bella home Rudy. I'll take care of your cousin."
Bella followed them down the hall to Paul's room and watched as Rudy sat his shaking form on the bed. "I got it from here man," Paul said as he laid back. "Thanks."
He locked his gaze with Bella's worried one as Rudy backed away. "Come 'ere Shorty," he said as he held out a shaking hand to her.
She took it and sat on the edge of the bed. "Don't worry Shorty. I'll be okay. Just go home with Rudy and I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
She leaned down and kissed his hand and it was only then she realized she was crying. She looked up at him and said, "Get better, okay? I hate seeing you like this."
He wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Don't cry Bella. I'll be fine." His eyes closed. "Jus' need sleep."
Rudy gently took her arm and led her from the room and she noticed Paul's Aunt speaking on the phone, her tone urgent, though she couldn't make out the words.
When they were in the car, Rudy glanced at her as she tried to dry her tears. "Hey, it's gonna be fine."
Bella brows drew down as she looked at him. "That seemed serious Rudy, and yet your mom refused to have him go to a hospital? It just doesn't seem right."
He sighed. "Look Bella, all I can tell you is that we were told this may happen. We were told what to watch for, so we could contact his mom the minute it did. That's all they told us. Well that, and that it was nothing life threatening, okay? Everything will be fine."
Bella looked down and nodded, but couldn't stifle the feeling that things wouldn't be okay. Something deep inside was telling her that this was profound and nothing would be the same again.
And she was afraid.
~ Jambi ~
So if I could I'd wish it all away.
If I thought tomorrow would take you away.
You're my peace of mind, my home, my center.
I'm just trying to hold on,
One more day.
~o0o~
After dinner and clean up, they moved into the living room and Paul sat on the couch while Bella opened the movie cabinet. "What do you feel like watching," she asked as she perused the titles. When he didn't answer, she looked over her shoulder to see him staring at her with a wicked smirk. "Paul?"
"I'm watching it," he said as he met her eyes and she smirked back.
"You really are a bad boy aren't you?"
He grinned. "I have my moments."
She turned back to the cabinet with a smile and said, "Okay, be serious. Pick a movie." She stepped out of the way and he leaned forward to get a better look. "300," he said after a moment and she grabbed it and put it on.
He reached over and turned off the lamp as she sat next to him. "Getting cozy there Lofty?"
He smirked as he put his arm around her and pulled her close. "Makes it easier to see the screen Shorty; nothing nefarious about it." After a moment, he leaned down and brushed his lips over hers as he murmured, "Then again, I should really get all this outta my system before you're under Charlie's gu… uh, protection."
She laughed softly against his smiling lips. "Is that so?" she whispered.
He gently pushed her back to lay on the couch as he followed, a wicked glint in his eyes as he settled over her, his lips hovering over hers.
She sighed and opened to him eagerly as he continued his kisses, some light and gentle, others stealing her breath with passion as his tongue delved deeply and his luscious lips sucked at hers.
"God, I love the way you feel against me…" He groaned as he ground his hips against her center. "…the way you taste… your scent… everything…" he whispered between kisses he left in a teasing path down her neck.
She arched into him, wanting… needing… "Paul," she breathed. Before she was even aware what she was doing, she'd buried one hand in his hair, wrapped a leg around his waist, and moaned lowly as she sought to pull him impossibly closer.
As his kisses continued, she was only vaguely aware of the movement of his hand. It slowly slid up the outside of her leg, where he paused to gently squeeze her hip and then her waist… Slowly, so slowly, he traced up her ribcage where it finally settled in a gentle but firm caress of her breast. As his thumb brushed over her clothed nipple, it ignited a longing in her center she'd never felt before, and she arched into his touch with a gasp of pleasure.
Her mind reeled with these new and overwhelming feelings and she found herself a bit scared at how easy it would be to succumb to them. Her body definitely wanted to… This new ache in her center practically demanded to be sated… filled… and she knew instinctively he could fulfill this ache he'd ignited.
Still, she knew, on a more conscious level, she needed to regain control. She wasn't ready for this. They weren't ready for this, and so she pushed against his chest. "Paul," she said lowly, "…we have to stop."
To her relief—and if she were being honest—disappointment, he did, and he drew back to look into her eyes. With gentle fingers, he traced the outline of her face as a small smile curved his lips. "You're right Shorty. I'm sorry for taking it so far."
She cupped his cheek. "Hey, I was in this too ya know. But I don't think we're ready. I think it would hurt what we have right now, rather than help it, ya know?"
He sat back and pulled her into his lap as his fingers ran through her hair. She laid her head against his shoulder as he spoke. "You're right Bella. I want more for us and you deserve better than a quickie on your mother's couch."
They sat quietly for a while after that, half-way watching the movie, but mostly just enjoying being together. Finally, Bella broke the comfortable silence and spoke. "So, tell me about your dreams. What do you see yourself doing in life?"
He smiled as their eyes met. "That's easy—baseball—pitching specifically. I wanna make it to the majors and I've worked my ass off to make that happen." He glanced down at her. "You know, Charlie has a lot to do with that."
"Yeah?" she questioned.
He nodded. "Yeah, my mom was great, but she was always busy getting her real estate license and then developing her career, so he sort of took me under his wing when I was fourteen. Never let me get down on myself. Never left me idle. If he had the time, he was always there, taking me fishing, or to the indoor batting and pitching cages."
She looked up. "I guess indoor would be a necessity in Forks."
"Yeah," he said with a chuckle. "All the damn rain kinda makes baseball a rare sport for kids around there. That's why I know if it hadn't been for Charlie, I wouldn't be as good as I am today." He stared off into the distance as he continued. "And I mean that in more ways than one."
"Well," she said with a sad sigh, "…at least my boyfriend has a good relationship with my dad."
He tightened his hold on her just a bit as he spoke. "He loves you very much Shorty. He was always talking about you and how proud he was of you." He looked down with a sad smile. "Honestly, there were times I used to get kinda jealous, wishing I had that."
She sat up to meet his eyes. "It sounds to me like you did have that from him Paul. If there's one thing I know about Charlie, it's that he doesn't know how to express himself, face to face with words. He chooses deeds instead. He must love you a lot to do the things he did."
She watched as tears filled Paul's eyes before he turned his head and cleared his throat. "Thanks for sayin' that Shorty, because… I—love Charlie way more than I ever loved my old man. He's the best man I've ever known and I'm glad that he'll have you for a while at least. I know it'll mean the world to him."
Now Bella's eyes filled with tears, and she laid her head back on his shoulder. "I'd say we're both lucky to have him, and I'm glad we found each other Paul."
"Me too Shorty," he murmured. "Me too."
~o0o~
Bella was once again standing in front of her open closet, trying to figure out what to wear. She had lots of nice things to choose from, mostly due to Renee's insistence. She really hated shopping, after all, but now she found herself thankful because she was getting ready to go on her first official date.
After the movie the night before, Paul had called Rudy to pick him up and then had formally asked her out on a date, a first for both of them.
He'd be here in an hour to pick her up, so she wanted to finish getting ready and then call Charlie. It had been too late to bother him last night after Paul had left.
Finally grabbing some linen shorts and a tank with a white, lacy over-shirt, she got dressed, ran a brush through her hair and sat at her desk.
She was nervous. What if he didn't want her there? Would he really, at this late date, want to deal with having her in his home and life? She just wasn't sure, and there was only one way to resolve it, so she picked up her phone and dialed.
"Chief Swan here," he answered and she felt like her heart was in her throat.
"Dad?" she said tentatively. "It's me—Bella. How are you?"
"Bells? Hey, it's great to hear from you kid. I'm doing fine, how are you? What have you been up to?"
"Just the usual really, but dad? I kinda called for a reason. Now, I don't want you to feel obligated—you can say no, and I'll totally understand…" She trailed off when he cut in.
"Whoa, slow down kid. Now, what can I do? It sounds like you need something…"
"Yeah dad… I want to come live with you for my last year of school."
There was silence on the line for a moment and she cringed at what he might be thinking. Finally, he spoke after clearing his throat.
"Sure Bells, I'd love to have you here. There's always been a place for you here kid."
She felt tears prick her eyes. "You sure dad? I won't cramp your style or anything?"
He chuckled. "My style? Uh, no kid. No style to cramp I'm afraid."
"That's great dad… Uh, I mean it's great you'll have me there, not the no style part."
"I know what ya meant kid," he said with amusement apparent in his voice. "So when can I expect you?"
She kind of froze at the question. When indeed? She'd have to see when Paul was leaving because she didn't want to miss any time with him.
"Uh, can I get back to you with a date dad? I mean, I know I need to be there before school starts, but I have some stuff to take care of here first."
"Sure Bells, that's fine. Just have your records sent to Forks High and I'll stop by there and take care of the rest."
"Thanks dad," she murmured as her heart ached. Why hadn't she considered this move sooner? So much wasted time…
"No problem. Was there something else you wanted to talk about?"
She thought of Paul briefly, but shook her head. "No dad, that was it."
"Okay then kid. Just call me with the date and flight info. I'll be there to pick you up."
"All right dad, thanks. I'll talk to you later."
"Sure Bells, bye."
"Bye." She pressed end and stared at her phone for a moment. That had been much easier than she'd thought it would, and she had to admit to feeling regret over how she'd disregarded him the past few years especially with all that Paul had told her.
Giving herself a mental shake, she tossed her phone in her bag, zipped it and headed down stairs to wait for Paul.
When she got down there, her mother was in the living room with Phil and they were watching a movie. She walked in and sat in the chair next to them.
"Hi baby," Renee said. "Wow, you look great. Going somewhere?"
"Yeah, Paul's picking me up for a date in a few."
Renee grinned. "Oooh, tell me about it. Where's he taking you?"
Bella shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know. He didn't say. He just said we'd be there most of the day and to dress comfortably, so I'm guessing it's nothing fancy, thank god."
Just then, the door bell rang and she grabbed her bag and walked out as she called a goodbye over her shoulder.
When she opened the door, she smiled at the sight of Paul, standing there with his signature smirk and a red rose in hand which he presented to her. "For my lovely date."
She stepped out and closed the door as she looked into his eyes. "Does it come with a kiss, because if not, I don't want it."
He reached out and drew her close. "Of course. Never let it be said I disappointed my girl."
With that, he leaned down and kissed her softly. When he drew away, she opened her eyes and said, "You're so good at that."
"You're not so bad yourself," he said with a grin. "But come on. We better leave now before that wall behind you sees some serious action."
He took her hand and walked her to the car where he opened the door for her. "Wow, full service and everything," she said as she got in.
He walked around and slid into the drivers seat. "Hey, I said I didn't date, not that I didn't know how to."
He started the car and pulled out into the street. "Nice car." she said. "It's Rudy's, right?"
He nodded as he propped an arm by the window. "Yeah, he can afford it because he still lives at home."
"Well, lots of people his age still live at home," she said with a shrug.
"I don't know," he said as he glanced at her. "I could see it if he was going to school or something, but he's got a full time job." He shrugged. "All I know is that I don't wanna be living on the rez when I'm his age. I can't wait to get outta there, ya know? Do more with my life than staying there would allow."
She nodded. "I can't say I disagree. I mean, I've been looking forward to independence for a while now. It'll be nice to finally be doing something for me; for my life."
"Exactly!" he said as he pulled in to a crowded parking lot. "There are so many people in our tribe who never leave the rez. They're born there, live their lives there and they die there and, to me, the prospect of that is depressing. I've often wondered why they do it, but I've never asked any of them. Most of the old-timers are cryptic bastards anyway, so I'm sure I wouldn't get a straight answer even if I did ask."
Bella chuckled as he cut the engine. "Sounds like that old lady that gave me this," and she held up her wrist.
"Yeah," he said as he undid the seat belt and opened the door. "Imagine dealing with several like her for most of your life."
He came around and opened her door and she got out and looked around as he locked the car. "An amusement park?" she asked with a grin.
"Yeah," he answered as he took her hand and they began walking. "Please tell me you like roller coasters."
She looked up at him with a grimace and he cocked a brow. "Well, to be honest, they scare the shit outta me…" She trailed off when he dropped his head and she rushed on. "But—I have you to hang on to, so it's all good."
He eyed her skeptically as they walked. "You're gonna hate this date aren't ya Shorty?"
She stopped and he turned to face her as she scowled up at him. "No. I'm with you and it'll be great. Now don't go getting emo on me 'cause then I'll have to find a way to kick your ass."
He stared at her for a beat before he cracked up laughing. "Fuck," he said as he tugged her along. "I think I'd like to see that Shorty."
"No you wouldn't," she said with conviction. "I can be very mean when I set my mind to it."
He slung an arm around her shoulders. "I don't doubt it." He grinned down at her. "I'd still like to witness it."
He already had the tickets, so they went straight to the gate and made their way inside. He pointed at the biggest coaster Bella'd ever seen. "How about that one first?
Bella stared. The thing had no less than three loops, plus a wicked looking cork-screw portion, and she swallowed thickly as she looked up at him. "Okay," she said weakly and they got in line.
When they got off the ride, she was smiling widely. "Holy shit that was fun!" she said as she hung onto his arm.
He smirked. "Somehow, I knew there was a thrill seeker hiding inside you. I could see it in your eyes Shorty. You like danger." He glanced down at her as they got in the next line. "I think that's why I caught your eye."
He pulled her into his arms as he leaned against the hand-rail and she tilted her head to look at him, a thoughtful expression on her face. "You know, I think you're right! I remember thinking that you were beautiful, in a bad boy sort of way the first time I saw you."
He nodded and kissed her quickly. "Yeah? I remember thinking that you were a sweet, good girl with a taste for the dark side," he drawled out in a deep voice.
She laughed and poked his ribs. "I guess we were both right."
"Yeah Shorty," he said as he caressed her cheek. "Looks like we were." They stared at each other and he murmured, "We were made for each other." Then he kissed her, slowly and softly which he only broke when the people behind them cleared their throat.
Bella blushed and they moved up. "So, what do you want for dinner? Most of the stuff here is junk, but I think I saw a couple of decent sit-down places. You wanna do that?" he asked as he looked at the map.
She shrugged as she leaned with her back against him. "Whatever you want. It doesn't have to be expensive."
"Hmm," he said. "There's an Italian place… that good with you?"
She turned and wrapped her arms around him. "Yeah, sounds good."
He folded the map and stuffed it in his pocket before wrapping her in his arms.
"I talked to Charlie," she said and felt him tense.
"And?" he questioned.
"It was easier than I expected. He's just waiting on a date and flight information." She looked up at him. "I wanted to see when you plan on leaving before setting a date for myself."
He moved her hair off her shoulder and kissed just under her ear. "Well," he said as he straightened back up. "I was planning on leaving mid-August so I'd have enough time to get my shit together for college. I can move into the dorm during the last week of August."
"Okay, so I'll arrange to fly out then too." She glanced up at him. "If that's all right with you… I mean, I don't want you to feel like I'm chasing you…"
She trailed off when his fingers covered her lips. "Quit with the insecure crap. I love that you'll be going with me. I wouldn't have it any other way."
They rode the next coaster and by the time they got off, they were both ready for dinner.
On their way to the restaurant, he held her hand and smiled down at her as she gushed about the ride. "I think that one is my favorite so far! We have to hit that one again before we leave."
"Yeah, okay," he laughed. "God, I've created a monster! I'm gonna be begging for mercy before we leave here tonight."
She grinned. "Wouldn't it be great to take a road trip of amusement parks?" She turned and walked backwards to see him. "We should plan one for this summer! What do you think? I have some cash saved, and it would be perfect! Just you and me on the road?"
He grinned and grabbed her before she backed over a bench. "Yeah, that sounds great Shorty, but don't kill yourself falling over a bench first."
"Yeah," she said as she took his arm. "That wouldn't be good." She looked at him. "So, we'll do it? You'll go with me?"
He cocked a brow. "You think you'll still want me around by then?"
"Yeah," she smiled up at him. "I will."
~o0o~
Somehow, they managed to luck out and get a table in a quiet corner of the restaurant. They both enjoyed the food, but the best part, to Bella, was just being together.
They talked quietly through the meal, sharing their hopes and dreams which, unknown to both of them, were expanding in their minds to include the other.
One thing Bella had noticed is that Paul had only mentioned his dad once and that was when he'd said he loved Charlie more. It made her curious and, as they shared a dessert, she finally found the courage to ask about it. "Paul?"
He looked at her as he took a drink of water. "Yeah?"
"Why don't you ever talk about your dad?"
Bella watched as he shut down so fast it was almost breathtaking to behold. His eyes turned cold and hard. His face went blank and the hand that'd been resting next to his water glass trembled noticeably before he clenched it into a fist. He looked away and she could see the muscles in his jaw twitch.
"Paul? You okay? I'm sorry! I'm sorry for bringing it up, I was just—curious," she finished weakly not quite sure how to fix the situation.
He stood abruptly, his chair making a scraping noise on the polished floor. "I'll be right back," he said stiffly before stalking off and Bella stared down at her lap, wondering how it had gone so wrong so quickly. It was as though a switch had been flipped, and it worried her.
When he got back a few minutes later, he didn't look much better and he tossed down cash to cover the check. "Come on," he said tightly. "I need to get you home."
She stood and followed him out of the restaurant and once he'd cleared the doors, she could barely keep up with him. Finally, she found her voice. "Paul, come on, talk to me. You don't have to talk about your dad, I swear not to ask again, but tell me what's going on now. Are you mad at me?"
He stopped and hung his head and she could swear his whole body was shaking. "No Bella," he said, his voice sounding a bit raspy. "I'm not mad at you. I just don't talk about that, and now I don't feel well." He turned his head to look at her finally. "I just really need to get you home so I can get some sleep. I think I might be getting sick or something."
She stepped forward and touched his face and gasped. "God, you're burning up! I'll drive you to your Aunt's house and Rudy can drive me home from there." She rubbed his cheek and his eyes closed.
"God, I feel better when you touch me. It doesn't hurt so bad when you touch me."
She took his hand and tugged. "Come on, there's no way I'm letting you drive if you're that sick, but let's get you home."
He smiled wanly. "Yeah, all right." He pulled her in for a hug and whispered against her hair, "I'm sorry for flipping my shit in there Shorty. It's just… it was bad B—real bad."
"Shh, it's all right," she said as she stroked the back of his neck. "You can tell me about it when you're ready and if that's never, then I accept it. You mean too much to me to lose you over something from your past."
He nodded against her shoulder and she backed away. "Let's go."
When she got him to his Aunt's house, he was shaking and moaning and she was scared for him. She parked, set the brake and ran to the front door where she knocked loudly until Rudy opened the door. One look at her anxious face had his eyes widening. "What happened Bella?"
"It's Paul, Rudy. He's really sick! Come help me with him!"
"Oh shit," he said as he ran out the door. "Bella, go in and get my mom."
She ran inside and found Paul's Aunt in the kitchen. "Hi Bella…"
"Paul's really sick and it seems like he's in pain! Should I just take him to the hospital?"
She watched as the woman's face went blank. "No Bella, I know what to do. Is Rudy helping him inside?"
Bella looked confused. "No hospital? But you didn't see him! He's burning up and it started suddenly! He was fine…"
The woman walked past her. "No hospitals Bella. He'll be fine. I know what to do."
When they walked out of the kitchen, Rudy was just helping Paul through the front door and his mother spoke to him. "Put Paul in bed and then take Bella home Rudy. I'll take care of your cousin."
Bella followed them down the hall to Paul's room and watched as Rudy sat his shaking form on the bed. "I got it from here man," Paul said as he laid back. "Thanks."
He locked his gaze with Bella's worried one as Rudy backed away. "Come 'ere Shorty," he said as he held out a shaking hand to her.
She took it and sat on the edge of the bed. "Don't worry Shorty. I'll be okay. Just go home with Rudy and I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
She leaned down and kissed his hand and it was only then she realized she was crying. She looked up at him and said, "Get better, okay? I hate seeing you like this."
He wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Don't cry Bella. I'll be fine." His eyes closed. "Jus' need sleep."
Rudy gently took her arm and led her from the room and she noticed Paul's Aunt speaking on the phone, her tone urgent, though she couldn't make out the words.
When they were in the car, Rudy glanced at her as she tried to dry her tears. "Hey, it's gonna be fine."
Bella brows drew down as she looked at him. "That seemed serious Rudy, and yet your mom refused to have him go to a hospital? It just doesn't seem right."
He sighed. "Look Bella, all I can tell you is that we were told this may happen. We were told what to watch for, so we could contact his mom the minute it did. That's all they told us. Well that, and that it was nothing life threatening, okay? Everything will be fine."
Bella looked down and nodded, but couldn't stifle the feeling that things wouldn't be okay. Something deep inside was telling her that this was profound and nothing would be the same again.
And she was afraid.
DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.