Isla de Cascadas Hermosas
by Wizardtho
Chapter 1:
I was running through Volterra, racing to save Edward before he could show himself to the humans at noon. My only comfort was Alice telling me before I bolted from the car, “You'll make it, Bella, if you run straight for him. Don't let anyone or anything change your path. Run through the fountain, not around it. Now go!”
One second I could see Edward standing in the shadows under the clock tower, just as I was coming up to the central fountain and getting ready to dash through it, then the next I was lifted off my feet by a hand over my mouth as well as an arm around my waist. In that same instant, I watched as a smile lit Edward's whole face, his lips forming my name as he walked two steps forward.
Before Edward could make it another step, a robed figure swiftly came up behind him, ripping his head from his shoulders. A silent scream tore at my throat; I tried clawing at the arm and hand holding me tightly. The last thing I saw -before I was whipped around in the other direction- was Edward's head in the hand of the robed figure, a smile still in place on his face, as his body slumped lifelessly to the ground.
There was a blur around me for several seconds, then I heard Alice's voice sob out as the darkness took over, “Jazz? Carlisle needs to call Eleazar... now. We didn't get to Edward in time, and I just barely made it to Bella. It went all wrong from the moment she stepped into the plaza. The wind shifted. He scented her... thought of it as her calling to him. Then he just... oh, God...”
The next time I woke, I was being held closely by a cool body. I buried my face further into the crook of the vampire's neck and shoulder, thinking it was Edward... that the nightmares were finally over... but then the scent was all wrong. I asked in my still sleepy state, “Carlisle? Did I fall asleep again while you were telling me one of your stories? I think some of them got twisted into my dreams. I didn't like this one; it was nothing like the others. I... Edw-”
I really need to not listen to stories of his history when I'm sleepy. I have the weirdest dreams each time... though none have ever been this violent.
I shivered at the flash of seeing Edward's head ripped from his body, then felt Carlisle hold me tighter as he let out a stuttered breath. His voice sounded broken as he choked out the words I feared hearing the most. “Oh, my Darling Girl... it wasn't a dream.”
I think I might have whimpered as reality crashed around me, but it felt like all the air was forcefully shoved from my body in that instant, so I couldn't be sure. I remember trying to scramble out of his embrace as I gasped for air, feeling one of my hands claw at my throat when I was unsuccessful at breathing, my head swimming as worried murmurs reached my ears from all around me. The last thing I remember was a cool set of arms catching me while Jasper whispered, “I can't affect her with my gift for some reason, but that's pure panic I'm gettin' from her, Carlisle. We're missin' somethin' to what happened, for it to be this strong.”
I felt a sting on my hip, then the world went black.
I woke to the soft sound of humming, along with a female hand stroking my hair. I still remembered what happened, but oddly, the air didn't force itself from my lungs this time. Tears stung at my still-closed eyes as I shuddered a breath.
Edward is gone. The robed figure. Red eyes piercing mine. Victoria.
The tear fell as my eyes blinked open, but the female hand tenderly wiped it away. I looked up to find Esme with a heartbroken look on her face. “I know, Sweetheart. I know. We are all grieving for him.”
I shook my head slightly, then choked out, “He wasn't my mate, Esme, but I still loved him. Even after how he left me, I still loved him so completely.”
Esme held me as I sobbed for several minutes, just rocking me while stroking my hair. When she finally spoke again, it was to ask, “What do you mean about how he left you, Darling?”
I let out a whooshed breath as I finished calming, then whispered, “He left me in the forest by my house that day. Told me I was just a distraction from his long existence, and that I pretty much wasn't good enough to be one of your family. He told me you all had already left, that none of you wanted me to come with you. He only stayed long enough to make a clean break. Then he just disappeared, leaving me standing in the forest alone. I tried to go after him, to make him explain why he said all those beautiful things to me if he never loved me, but he was too fast.”
I shook my head as I unconsciously wrapped my arm around my ribs, then choked out, “I got lost... turned around. I just kept trying to find him, even in the dark. Then she found me... kept taunting me from the shadows, getting me more twisted around, making me bleed every time I tried to give up. She toyed with me for hours before she finally showed herself. By that time, I already knew I wasn't going to live to see sunrise. I was bleeding heavily, mixed up and confused, brokenhearted. She just kept saying 'a mate for a mate' each time she cut or bit into my skin.”
Esme looked at me horrified, then I heard a soft knock on the door before a very concerned Carlisle came into the room. He sat down at the end of the bed, pulled my sock feet into his lap, then I continued. “When she finally got tired of her game -when she was finally going to end it- was when the wolves showed up. They ran her off, then Sam carried me heavily bleeding all the way back to the main road, where the ambulance and Charlie met us. I was in and out of consciousness for a good bit of time, but I remember Sam telling Charlie that it was an animal attack.”
I scooted off the bed, knowing they needed to see, even as my arm tightened around my ribs. Once I stood on shaky legs and was able to balance, I lifted my shirt to just under my bra line, turning in a circle to show them my scars. “This is what Victoria did to me... but you aren’t even seeing half of them.”
I closed my eyes so I didn't have to see the pity on their faces, but I knew they were taking in the claw-like scars and bite marks that littered my torso. They still looked raw -an angry pink- even after all this time, since the doctors could never figure out while they wouldn't 'heal properly'.
After several seconds, I smelled Carlisle's scent as he gently unfisted my hands from my shirt, replaced my top, then tenderly pulled me into his arms. “Is she dead? Did the pack catch and kill her?”
At his broken whisper, I shook my head, “No... they haven't been able to. She's sneaky and evasive. I think she has a gift of some sort to help her out of sticky situations, because no matter what the pack has tried, they can only manage to keep her away from me... not get close enough to kill her.”
Carlisle brought me back to the bed, then pulled me down onto his lap as I said, “I was in the hospital until almost Christmas, then at home on rest orders until the week before Alice showed up at my house. There was always a wolf with me, plus at least one more patrolling around my house until I left with Alice. Since I didn't want to fail, and had so much time on my hands while healing, I decided to test out of school… get my GED. I had to beg Dr. Gerandy to let me go in to take the test. He finally allowed it, as long as the school nurse was able to stay in the room with me while I tested, along with the test being after school hours. He didn't want me under more stress around the other kids. I was the only one taking the test, with the principal was giving it, so there was no problem with the nurse staying.”
Esme stroked my hair. It was silent for several minutes while Carlisle held me. I was finally calm enough to look around after her soothing attention, so I asked, “Where are we?”
Carlisle gave me a sad smile, then offered, “On our private jet. We met you and Alice in New York. We are flying you to safety. We don't know yet, whether one of the Volturi noticed you in the plaza, so we are taking you somewhere safe.”
I shook my head, then whispered hoarsely as I remembered vivid red eyes piercing my brown ones, “He did. The one in the cloak that... that killed Edward... he was looking right at me as he did it. I don't even know what went wrong. I was supposed to make it in time. I did everything Alice told me to. It wasn't supposed to happen that way. I'm soo sorry. I tried, I promise I tried.”
I was crying hard by the time I finished, but both Esme and Carlisle held me tightly as they cooed that it wasn't my fault. It took them several minutes of holding me -and explaining that Edward made a split-second decision that changed the vision's outcome- for me to be able to calm down some. When I finally did, I felt exhausted as well as sticky from all the crying, so I asked, “Is there a restroom where I can clean up a bit? Is there time before we land?”
Esme nodded as Carlisle kissed my forehead before saying, “Alice has already placed a set of clothing for you in the cabin's private bathroom. You are welcome to take a relaxing shower, as we won't be landing in Rio for a few more hours. Take your time, Darling. Esme will have something warm ready for you to eat when you join us in the main room.”
When I retreated to the cabin's private bath, I sighed in relief at seeing comfortable clothing sitting on the counter for me. I didn't worry about what it actually was, though, until I got out of the shower with the towel wrapped around me. That's when I noticed the white flutter-shoulder peasant blouse with the banded bottom, the pink and white crochet waist boho skirt, along with the insanely expensive Burberry espadrille wedges.
I whimpered out Alice's name in worry, wondering where in the hell my purse went to, since I would need my body makeup to cover my scars. She appeared with it in hand only seconds later as I froze in panic. “Shh... listen to me, Bella. Not one person out there is going to think differently of you because you have scars. They are proof that you lived through something horrific, then came out of that hell a stronger person.”
She deliberately leaned, placing her cheek at the start of the claw marks on my shoulder while hugging me, then looked into my eyes as she asked, “Do you think I care for Jasper any less because of his scars from the Southern Wars?”
I shook my head with a slight whimper, knowing that she never would, but still feeling unsure about my own. She hugged me to her again, whispering comfortingly, “We will never judge you or treat you differently because of them, Sweetie. I know you aren't ready to go without covering them, so finish drying off, then let me know when you're ready for me to help. I'll wait on the bed until you call me.”
I let out a shaky breath as the door closed behind her, but it took me a full minute before I gathered myself enough to put on the white lace strapless bra and boyshorts in the pile.
Alice hummed softly as she meticulously made all of my scars look as invisible as possible. Even though I had tears constantly ready to spill from my eyes, she never once acted as if this was any different from putting makeup on my face. I sighed unconsciously when she finished, offering, “All set and waterproof, Sweetie. I'll let you finish dressing now. Come out when you're ready.”
Another sigh of relief slipped through my lips as a tear made its way down my cheek, then I whispered softly, the gratitude clear in my voice, “Thank you, Ali.”
After taking my time getting dressed, while looking for any hint of my scars in the mirror, I slipped my shoes on and tried to determine what to do with my hair. It had grown so long and healthy, with all the supplements the doctors had me taking through my physical therapy, that the ends now curled around my hips when down. Not really wanting to fuss too much with it, I decided to just run a bit of anti-frizz serum through it, then diffuse it until it was mostly dry. The last thing I wanted was to end up in another hospital by being sick, so drying it was definitely a must.
I took a last calming breath, my heart aching at knowing Edward wouldn't be in the next room with his family, then swallowed thickly before opening the door. I walked tentatively down the short hall, then was greeted by everyone lounging around a sitting area on the various furniture. Esme and Carlisle both smiled up at me, then Carlisle held his hand out for me to sit between them as he asked, “Feel better now, Darling?”
I nodded, taking a seat between him and Esme on the couch as I said softly, “Yes, thank you.”
I looked around at everyone, who must have been waiting for me to speak, then looked between Alice and Carlisle. “Okay. So there's no use in beating around the bush. I told you that guard looked directly at me in the plaza, plus you know now that Victoria's not satisfied with just her little game. You said something earlier about taking me somewhere safe, so I assume you have a plan in place already. Tell me, please, so I know what to expect.”
Carlisle rose an eyebrow at Jasper, I guess asking him something to do with my emotions. Jasper nodded seriously. Carlisle let out a breath, then said, “There is now no getting around turning you, Darling. I know Edward was adamantly against the topic where you were concerned...”
His voice cracked on Edward's name, making my heart clench in my chest, then he continued, “... but if the robed guard saw you, he undoubtedly saw Alice holding you. We all agreed that it would be a good idea for you to go into hiding -for a short while- before your change.”
I nodded, then looked silently between Jasper and Carlisle. “There's more, isn't there... something you aren't telling me.”
Jasper nodded as he took over the explanation. “With ya bein’ spotted, and Aro readin’ Edward's thoughts durin’ their meetin’, ya won't be safe with any of us. We can't risk startin’ your change while ya grieve over him, Sugar, because it's a recipe for disaster. Ya need time to let everythin’ settle, so that once you're a newborn, ya won't go off half-cocked lookin’ for revenge, just to end up gettin’ yourself killed.”
I nodded again after letting that little tidbit settle in, then said softly, “So I'll be alone... again.”
Jasper gasped slightly with a wince, then shook his head, “No, Sugar. We woulda never left in the first place, if it was any of our decisions to make. Ya hafta understand that, in our world, mates have the ultimate say over each other's' welfare. With us thinkin’ that Edward was your mate at the time, the decision was his and his alone to make. Not one person in this room agreed, but we had to go along with what he felt was best for ya.”
It took me a whole minute or two to catch his underlying words, then my breathing hitched in my throat as I looked up at him. “Thought... you said you thought we were mates at the time. So I was right?”
Carlisle looked at me intently, offering, “If he was your true mate, my darling girl, he would have never made it out of state while trying to leave. His continued refusal to allow your change, plus his insistence that leaving you was the only option to keep you safe, allowed us to see after we were gone that he was not your true mate. Though I have no doubt that Edward loved you with his whole heart, it was not the soul-binding love of true mates. He would have been physically unable to leave you, if he were, Bella.”
I got up silently, walking over to the windows to look out at the puffy clouds. I stood there for quite a while, with no one saying a word, until I finally whispered sadly, “I had a feeling. When he left me like he did... in the forest... I think I knew then. I had a lot of time to think in the hospital, as well as while I was on bed rest at home. At one point, I remembered you telling me about how mates couldn't stand to be parted for long. I think that's when I put it all together, really. I loved him so much... I still do... but I started seeing all the little things that weren't quite right between us. None of it changed my love for him one bit, but I started seeing how we couldn't be mates. Fundamental things -things all of you have at the basic core of your relationships with your mates- we didn't come close to having.”
I wrapped my arms around my ribs, the ache in my chest more prominent while saying my inner thoughts aloud, then continued. “Putting aside the difference in our mortality, we didn't have open communication or complete trust, even after spending almost all of our time together for months. He'd change the subject or give me half-truths when our conversations delved too deep for his comfort level, while I'd temper telling him my thoughts or how I was feeling about things in return. Though each couple has its own way of accomplishing it, you are all completely open with your mates, trusting each other implicitly with your most hidden selves. I always felt that I was never enough as I was... felt the inequality between us. During my recovery, I finally let myself understand that it was because we were never supposed to be together for forever, only for a while.”
I didn't realise I had been rubbing my palm against the worst of the scars on my chest, until Jasper placed a tender hand on my shoulder while tipping my chin up to look me in the eyes. He wiped my tears, then asked softly as his hand hovered above my body, “May I? I dislike seein’ ya in so much pain, Sugar.”
I shrugged, but nodded my consent. “I don't even realise it's there most of the time, because I've found ways to ignore it. The pain is just something I've had to learn to live with, but it does get worse when I'm upset or stressed. I don't mind, though, if you want to help.”
After Alice guided me over to the loveseat she had been sitting with Jasper, she pulled me down onto her lap sideways, then Jasper situated my legs onto his lap while preserving my modesty. He wrapped one arm back behind Alice, leaned into the both of us, then again looked to me for permission to help. I nodded with a small smile, so he tenderly placed his free hand on my sternum.
His hand was large, his palm resting between my breasts as his fingers landed along my collarbone up near my right shoulder. I let out a small sigh as he started leeching the pain from my marks, then whispered while placing my cheek against Alice's, “Thank you.”
After a few moments, I kissed Ali's cheek and cupped Jasper's, then looked to Carlisle. He smiled caringly as I asked, “Okay... so Jasper said I wouldn't be alone, but if it's not safe for any of you to stay, who will I be with?”
His smile brightened, then he offered, “Do you remember me mentioning other vampires that share our diet during our talks?”
I nodded, “Of course... the Denali coven. But if I'll be staying with them, why not take me to Alaska?”
Jasper shook his head, but it was Rosalie that offered, “Because, Bella, you won't be staying with the whole coven. If the Volturi were to come looking for any of us and not find us, they'd go to Denali to see what any of them knew about our location. Our ties with them will put them in danger if they know where we are or where you'll be hiding, so Carlisle contacted Eleazar discretely to ask for his help.”
I nodded, then shook my head, not understanding. “Wait. I thought Edward said Eleazar was mated to Carmen. Wouldn't she know if he did, since he'll be helping me? Won't she be with him?”
Emmett shook his head, “No, Little Bit. They aren't mates. They were lovers on and off for about a century, but oddly enough, Carmen found her mate in Laurant when we sent him up that way during the James mess. He's taking the diet change like a champ, from what Eleazar said.”
I gasped, then smiled as a piece of the puzzle fell into place, “He came to talk to me, not that long ago. Jake said he had weird burnt orange eyes, so he wouldn't let him near my house or the rez. I didn't think about the change in diet, but it makes sense. He told Jake that he just came to warn me. Victoria had tried to find out about your powers. I guess she thought you hadn't left for some reason... thought you were helping to protect me. She was trying to get any information she could, but he turned her away. He told Jake he just wanted to live peacefully, but couldn't condone anything to do with harming an innocent human.”
Jasper chuckled, then eyed Alice speculatively. “I guess I know why ya were always sendin’ one of us back, huh, Darlin?”
Alice nodded, “I didn't know about the attack after Edward's departure, Bella. I don't know how, but I didn't see you being attacked at all, or your recovery. The first vision I had of you was Victoria deciding to watch you from outside your bedroom window. I knew none of us could stand not checking up on you if we went back to the house for any reason, so I was constantly sending someone back to Forks for one reason or another. I wanted to make sure there was always a fresh trail from one of us near your house, hoping it would scare her off. None of us ever came across her scent, or we would have alerted the others right away.”
I nodded, more pieces of this odd puzzle falling into place, then looked back at Carlisle. “So Eleazar will be keeping me safe and hidden for a bit, from both Victoria and the Volturi, then my change will happen. Can I at least keep in touch with you until then?”
It was Rosalie who spoke seriously, “You'll be tired of us by the time your change nears, because of how much we'll all be calling and video chatting.”
I was slightly surprised she was being so civil to me, but at the small wave of sincerity Jasper sent me, I ducked my head in acceptance with a smile, “Thanks. I've just missed you all so much.”
I was running through Volterra, racing to save Edward before he could show himself to the humans at noon. My only comfort was Alice telling me before I bolted from the car, “You'll make it, Bella, if you run straight for him. Don't let anyone or anything change your path. Run through the fountain, not around it. Now go!”
One second I could see Edward standing in the shadows under the clock tower, just as I was coming up to the central fountain and getting ready to dash through it, then the next I was lifted off my feet by a hand over my mouth as well as an arm around my waist. In that same instant, I watched as a smile lit Edward's whole face, his lips forming my name as he walked two steps forward.
Before Edward could make it another step, a robed figure swiftly came up behind him, ripping his head from his shoulders. A silent scream tore at my throat; I tried clawing at the arm and hand holding me tightly. The last thing I saw -before I was whipped around in the other direction- was Edward's head in the hand of the robed figure, a smile still in place on his face, as his body slumped lifelessly to the ground.
There was a blur around me for several seconds, then I heard Alice's voice sob out as the darkness took over, “Jazz? Carlisle needs to call Eleazar... now. We didn't get to Edward in time, and I just barely made it to Bella. It went all wrong from the moment she stepped into the plaza. The wind shifted. He scented her... thought of it as her calling to him. Then he just... oh, God...”
The next time I woke, I was being held closely by a cool body. I buried my face further into the crook of the vampire's neck and shoulder, thinking it was Edward... that the nightmares were finally over... but then the scent was all wrong. I asked in my still sleepy state, “Carlisle? Did I fall asleep again while you were telling me one of your stories? I think some of them got twisted into my dreams. I didn't like this one; it was nothing like the others. I... Edw-”
I really need to not listen to stories of his history when I'm sleepy. I have the weirdest dreams each time... though none have ever been this violent.
I shivered at the flash of seeing Edward's head ripped from his body, then felt Carlisle hold me tighter as he let out a stuttered breath. His voice sounded broken as he choked out the words I feared hearing the most. “Oh, my Darling Girl... it wasn't a dream.”
I think I might have whimpered as reality crashed around me, but it felt like all the air was forcefully shoved from my body in that instant, so I couldn't be sure. I remember trying to scramble out of his embrace as I gasped for air, feeling one of my hands claw at my throat when I was unsuccessful at breathing, my head swimming as worried murmurs reached my ears from all around me. The last thing I remember was a cool set of arms catching me while Jasper whispered, “I can't affect her with my gift for some reason, but that's pure panic I'm gettin' from her, Carlisle. We're missin' somethin' to what happened, for it to be this strong.”
I felt a sting on my hip, then the world went black.
I woke to the soft sound of humming, along with a female hand stroking my hair. I still remembered what happened, but oddly, the air didn't force itself from my lungs this time. Tears stung at my still-closed eyes as I shuddered a breath.
Edward is gone. The robed figure. Red eyes piercing mine. Victoria.
The tear fell as my eyes blinked open, but the female hand tenderly wiped it away. I looked up to find Esme with a heartbroken look on her face. “I know, Sweetheart. I know. We are all grieving for him.”
I shook my head slightly, then choked out, “He wasn't my mate, Esme, but I still loved him. Even after how he left me, I still loved him so completely.”
Esme held me as I sobbed for several minutes, just rocking me while stroking my hair. When she finally spoke again, it was to ask, “What do you mean about how he left you, Darling?”
I let out a whooshed breath as I finished calming, then whispered, “He left me in the forest by my house that day. Told me I was just a distraction from his long existence, and that I pretty much wasn't good enough to be one of your family. He told me you all had already left, that none of you wanted me to come with you. He only stayed long enough to make a clean break. Then he just disappeared, leaving me standing in the forest alone. I tried to go after him, to make him explain why he said all those beautiful things to me if he never loved me, but he was too fast.”
I shook my head as I unconsciously wrapped my arm around my ribs, then choked out, “I got lost... turned around. I just kept trying to find him, even in the dark. Then she found me... kept taunting me from the shadows, getting me more twisted around, making me bleed every time I tried to give up. She toyed with me for hours before she finally showed herself. By that time, I already knew I wasn't going to live to see sunrise. I was bleeding heavily, mixed up and confused, brokenhearted. She just kept saying 'a mate for a mate' each time she cut or bit into my skin.”
Esme looked at me horrified, then I heard a soft knock on the door before a very concerned Carlisle came into the room. He sat down at the end of the bed, pulled my sock feet into his lap, then I continued. “When she finally got tired of her game -when she was finally going to end it- was when the wolves showed up. They ran her off, then Sam carried me heavily bleeding all the way back to the main road, where the ambulance and Charlie met us. I was in and out of consciousness for a good bit of time, but I remember Sam telling Charlie that it was an animal attack.”
I scooted off the bed, knowing they needed to see, even as my arm tightened around my ribs. Once I stood on shaky legs and was able to balance, I lifted my shirt to just under my bra line, turning in a circle to show them my scars. “This is what Victoria did to me... but you aren’t even seeing half of them.”
I closed my eyes so I didn't have to see the pity on their faces, but I knew they were taking in the claw-like scars and bite marks that littered my torso. They still looked raw -an angry pink- even after all this time, since the doctors could never figure out while they wouldn't 'heal properly'.
After several seconds, I smelled Carlisle's scent as he gently unfisted my hands from my shirt, replaced my top, then tenderly pulled me into his arms. “Is she dead? Did the pack catch and kill her?”
At his broken whisper, I shook my head, “No... they haven't been able to. She's sneaky and evasive. I think she has a gift of some sort to help her out of sticky situations, because no matter what the pack has tried, they can only manage to keep her away from me... not get close enough to kill her.”
Carlisle brought me back to the bed, then pulled me down onto his lap as I said, “I was in the hospital until almost Christmas, then at home on rest orders until the week before Alice showed up at my house. There was always a wolf with me, plus at least one more patrolling around my house until I left with Alice. Since I didn't want to fail, and had so much time on my hands while healing, I decided to test out of school… get my GED. I had to beg Dr. Gerandy to let me go in to take the test. He finally allowed it, as long as the school nurse was able to stay in the room with me while I tested, along with the test being after school hours. He didn't want me under more stress around the other kids. I was the only one taking the test, with the principal was giving it, so there was no problem with the nurse staying.”
Esme stroked my hair. It was silent for several minutes while Carlisle held me. I was finally calm enough to look around after her soothing attention, so I asked, “Where are we?”
Carlisle gave me a sad smile, then offered, “On our private jet. We met you and Alice in New York. We are flying you to safety. We don't know yet, whether one of the Volturi noticed you in the plaza, so we are taking you somewhere safe.”
I shook my head, then whispered hoarsely as I remembered vivid red eyes piercing my brown ones, “He did. The one in the cloak that... that killed Edward... he was looking right at me as he did it. I don't even know what went wrong. I was supposed to make it in time. I did everything Alice told me to. It wasn't supposed to happen that way. I'm soo sorry. I tried, I promise I tried.”
I was crying hard by the time I finished, but both Esme and Carlisle held me tightly as they cooed that it wasn't my fault. It took them several minutes of holding me -and explaining that Edward made a split-second decision that changed the vision's outcome- for me to be able to calm down some. When I finally did, I felt exhausted as well as sticky from all the crying, so I asked, “Is there a restroom where I can clean up a bit? Is there time before we land?”
Esme nodded as Carlisle kissed my forehead before saying, “Alice has already placed a set of clothing for you in the cabin's private bathroom. You are welcome to take a relaxing shower, as we won't be landing in Rio for a few more hours. Take your time, Darling. Esme will have something warm ready for you to eat when you join us in the main room.”
When I retreated to the cabin's private bath, I sighed in relief at seeing comfortable clothing sitting on the counter for me. I didn't worry about what it actually was, though, until I got out of the shower with the towel wrapped around me. That's when I noticed the white flutter-shoulder peasant blouse with the banded bottom, the pink and white crochet waist boho skirt, along with the insanely expensive Burberry espadrille wedges.
I whimpered out Alice's name in worry, wondering where in the hell my purse went to, since I would need my body makeup to cover my scars. She appeared with it in hand only seconds later as I froze in panic. “Shh... listen to me, Bella. Not one person out there is going to think differently of you because you have scars. They are proof that you lived through something horrific, then came out of that hell a stronger person.”
She deliberately leaned, placing her cheek at the start of the claw marks on my shoulder while hugging me, then looked into my eyes as she asked, “Do you think I care for Jasper any less because of his scars from the Southern Wars?”
I shook my head with a slight whimper, knowing that she never would, but still feeling unsure about my own. She hugged me to her again, whispering comfortingly, “We will never judge you or treat you differently because of them, Sweetie. I know you aren't ready to go without covering them, so finish drying off, then let me know when you're ready for me to help. I'll wait on the bed until you call me.”
I let out a shaky breath as the door closed behind her, but it took me a full minute before I gathered myself enough to put on the white lace strapless bra and boyshorts in the pile.
Alice hummed softly as she meticulously made all of my scars look as invisible as possible. Even though I had tears constantly ready to spill from my eyes, she never once acted as if this was any different from putting makeup on my face. I sighed unconsciously when she finished, offering, “All set and waterproof, Sweetie. I'll let you finish dressing now. Come out when you're ready.”
Another sigh of relief slipped through my lips as a tear made its way down my cheek, then I whispered softly, the gratitude clear in my voice, “Thank you, Ali.”
After taking my time getting dressed, while looking for any hint of my scars in the mirror, I slipped my shoes on and tried to determine what to do with my hair. It had grown so long and healthy, with all the supplements the doctors had me taking through my physical therapy, that the ends now curled around my hips when down. Not really wanting to fuss too much with it, I decided to just run a bit of anti-frizz serum through it, then diffuse it until it was mostly dry. The last thing I wanted was to end up in another hospital by being sick, so drying it was definitely a must.
I took a last calming breath, my heart aching at knowing Edward wouldn't be in the next room with his family, then swallowed thickly before opening the door. I walked tentatively down the short hall, then was greeted by everyone lounging around a sitting area on the various furniture. Esme and Carlisle both smiled up at me, then Carlisle held his hand out for me to sit between them as he asked, “Feel better now, Darling?”
I nodded, taking a seat between him and Esme on the couch as I said softly, “Yes, thank you.”
I looked around at everyone, who must have been waiting for me to speak, then looked between Alice and Carlisle. “Okay. So there's no use in beating around the bush. I told you that guard looked directly at me in the plaza, plus you know now that Victoria's not satisfied with just her little game. You said something earlier about taking me somewhere safe, so I assume you have a plan in place already. Tell me, please, so I know what to expect.”
Carlisle rose an eyebrow at Jasper, I guess asking him something to do with my emotions. Jasper nodded seriously. Carlisle let out a breath, then said, “There is now no getting around turning you, Darling. I know Edward was adamantly against the topic where you were concerned...”
His voice cracked on Edward's name, making my heart clench in my chest, then he continued, “... but if the robed guard saw you, he undoubtedly saw Alice holding you. We all agreed that it would be a good idea for you to go into hiding -for a short while- before your change.”
I nodded, then looked silently between Jasper and Carlisle. “There's more, isn't there... something you aren't telling me.”
Jasper nodded as he took over the explanation. “With ya bein’ spotted, and Aro readin’ Edward's thoughts durin’ their meetin’, ya won't be safe with any of us. We can't risk startin’ your change while ya grieve over him, Sugar, because it's a recipe for disaster. Ya need time to let everythin’ settle, so that once you're a newborn, ya won't go off half-cocked lookin’ for revenge, just to end up gettin’ yourself killed.”
I nodded again after letting that little tidbit settle in, then said softly, “So I'll be alone... again.”
Jasper gasped slightly with a wince, then shook his head, “No, Sugar. We woulda never left in the first place, if it was any of our decisions to make. Ya hafta understand that, in our world, mates have the ultimate say over each other's' welfare. With us thinkin’ that Edward was your mate at the time, the decision was his and his alone to make. Not one person in this room agreed, but we had to go along with what he felt was best for ya.”
It took me a whole minute or two to catch his underlying words, then my breathing hitched in my throat as I looked up at him. “Thought... you said you thought we were mates at the time. So I was right?”
Carlisle looked at me intently, offering, “If he was your true mate, my darling girl, he would have never made it out of state while trying to leave. His continued refusal to allow your change, plus his insistence that leaving you was the only option to keep you safe, allowed us to see after we were gone that he was not your true mate. Though I have no doubt that Edward loved you with his whole heart, it was not the soul-binding love of true mates. He would have been physically unable to leave you, if he were, Bella.”
I got up silently, walking over to the windows to look out at the puffy clouds. I stood there for quite a while, with no one saying a word, until I finally whispered sadly, “I had a feeling. When he left me like he did... in the forest... I think I knew then. I had a lot of time to think in the hospital, as well as while I was on bed rest at home. At one point, I remembered you telling me about how mates couldn't stand to be parted for long. I think that's when I put it all together, really. I loved him so much... I still do... but I started seeing all the little things that weren't quite right between us. None of it changed my love for him one bit, but I started seeing how we couldn't be mates. Fundamental things -things all of you have at the basic core of your relationships with your mates- we didn't come close to having.”
I wrapped my arms around my ribs, the ache in my chest more prominent while saying my inner thoughts aloud, then continued. “Putting aside the difference in our mortality, we didn't have open communication or complete trust, even after spending almost all of our time together for months. He'd change the subject or give me half-truths when our conversations delved too deep for his comfort level, while I'd temper telling him my thoughts or how I was feeling about things in return. Though each couple has its own way of accomplishing it, you are all completely open with your mates, trusting each other implicitly with your most hidden selves. I always felt that I was never enough as I was... felt the inequality between us. During my recovery, I finally let myself understand that it was because we were never supposed to be together for forever, only for a while.”
I didn't realise I had been rubbing my palm against the worst of the scars on my chest, until Jasper placed a tender hand on my shoulder while tipping my chin up to look me in the eyes. He wiped my tears, then asked softly as his hand hovered above my body, “May I? I dislike seein’ ya in so much pain, Sugar.”
I shrugged, but nodded my consent. “I don't even realise it's there most of the time, because I've found ways to ignore it. The pain is just something I've had to learn to live with, but it does get worse when I'm upset or stressed. I don't mind, though, if you want to help.”
After Alice guided me over to the loveseat she had been sitting with Jasper, she pulled me down onto her lap sideways, then Jasper situated my legs onto his lap while preserving my modesty. He wrapped one arm back behind Alice, leaned into the both of us, then again looked to me for permission to help. I nodded with a small smile, so he tenderly placed his free hand on my sternum.
His hand was large, his palm resting between my breasts as his fingers landed along my collarbone up near my right shoulder. I let out a small sigh as he started leeching the pain from my marks, then whispered while placing my cheek against Alice's, “Thank you.”
After a few moments, I kissed Ali's cheek and cupped Jasper's, then looked to Carlisle. He smiled caringly as I asked, “Okay... so Jasper said I wouldn't be alone, but if it's not safe for any of you to stay, who will I be with?”
His smile brightened, then he offered, “Do you remember me mentioning other vampires that share our diet during our talks?”
I nodded, “Of course... the Denali coven. But if I'll be staying with them, why not take me to Alaska?”
Jasper shook his head, but it was Rosalie that offered, “Because, Bella, you won't be staying with the whole coven. If the Volturi were to come looking for any of us and not find us, they'd go to Denali to see what any of them knew about our location. Our ties with them will put them in danger if they know where we are or where you'll be hiding, so Carlisle contacted Eleazar discretely to ask for his help.”
I nodded, then shook my head, not understanding. “Wait. I thought Edward said Eleazar was mated to Carmen. Wouldn't she know if he did, since he'll be helping me? Won't she be with him?”
Emmett shook his head, “No, Little Bit. They aren't mates. They were lovers on and off for about a century, but oddly enough, Carmen found her mate in Laurant when we sent him up that way during the James mess. He's taking the diet change like a champ, from what Eleazar said.”
I gasped, then smiled as a piece of the puzzle fell into place, “He came to talk to me, not that long ago. Jake said he had weird burnt orange eyes, so he wouldn't let him near my house or the rez. I didn't think about the change in diet, but it makes sense. He told Jake that he just came to warn me. Victoria had tried to find out about your powers. I guess she thought you hadn't left for some reason... thought you were helping to protect me. She was trying to get any information she could, but he turned her away. He told Jake he just wanted to live peacefully, but couldn't condone anything to do with harming an innocent human.”
Jasper chuckled, then eyed Alice speculatively. “I guess I know why ya were always sendin’ one of us back, huh, Darlin?”
Alice nodded, “I didn't know about the attack after Edward's departure, Bella. I don't know how, but I didn't see you being attacked at all, or your recovery. The first vision I had of you was Victoria deciding to watch you from outside your bedroom window. I knew none of us could stand not checking up on you if we went back to the house for any reason, so I was constantly sending someone back to Forks for one reason or another. I wanted to make sure there was always a fresh trail from one of us near your house, hoping it would scare her off. None of us ever came across her scent, or we would have alerted the others right away.”
I nodded, more pieces of this odd puzzle falling into place, then looked back at Carlisle. “So Eleazar will be keeping me safe and hidden for a bit, from both Victoria and the Volturi, then my change will happen. Can I at least keep in touch with you until then?”
It was Rosalie who spoke seriously, “You'll be tired of us by the time your change nears, because of how much we'll all be calling and video chatting.”
I was slightly surprised she was being so civil to me, but at the small wave of sincerity Jasper sent me, I ducked my head in acceptance with a smile, “Thanks. I've just missed you all so much.”