The Inauspicious Beginnings Of A Prince
by Laura Spudzmom
Chapter 13
When he got home, he tried his best to slip in unnoticed but as usual for him it seemed, it was not to be.
Esme was waiting for him next to his bedroom door.
"Where have you been Jasper? I've been worried."
Heaving a sigh, he slipped past her and into his room, placing his bag down by the closet before flopping bonelessly on his bed.
"I've been out Esme. That's all you need to know."
He stared at the ceiling as she made her way to a chair and sat.
"Jasper honey, we just worry about you and want to know you're safe. Is that too much to ask?"
"Yes, it is Esme. I'm unused to accounting for every minute of my day to someone else. I'm used to being trusted enough to take care of myself for fuck sake. I'm Vampire and a trained fighter in multiple disciplines. I'm sure that I could kick every ass in this house many times over with minimal effort."
He looked at her finally.
"Now, how in the world are any of you going to protect me?"
She looked up from her hands that were clenched in her lap.
"That's how a family is run Jasper."
She chose to ignore his scoff at the word 'family'.
"They stay accountable to each other because they love and care for each other. It's not based on who can kick whose ass honey."
She smirked as he raised his brows at her language, she assumed. Before he could comment she continued.
"Now, I didn't seek you out to argue. I actually have a purpose. I would like to speak with you about contraception Jasper. Do you use condoms when you have sex?"
She noticed with growing humor that his brows had inched up even higher than before.
"Esme, I didn't know you had such brass balls when it comes to such subjects. I'm almost impressed."
He drawled out arrogantly as he stared up at the ceiling, hands behind his head.
She smirked. "You'll find there is lots that you don't know about me Jasper, just as there are many things I don't know about you. Hopefully we can come to know each other better. Now answer the question please." She sat back, crossing her legs, waiting.
"Not that it's any of your business but yes I do, when I am with a human. I prefer bareback with vampires; more sensation."
She rose from her seat and nodded.
"Wonderful. Just let me know if you run out. I can get more for you from your father if you have a need."
He scoffed. "Esme, I've been buying my own condoms since I was thirteen years old. Why in the world would I seek your assistance for such a thing now?"
This had shocked her.
"Jasper! thirteen?! I can't even imagine that you were mature enough to manage at that point!"
"Let's just say that Jane is not your typical fourteen year old Esme, and leave it at that."
"Oh Jasper, what sort of life you have lead my son."
Her voice shook with her emotion and his brow furrowed. He was determined not to get caught up in her emotions again.
Resentment filled him. No, he'd leave all that shit for his brother who seemed more than eager.
"Don't start with me Esme. I have loved my life for the most part and there is only one thing in this world that I would trade my years in Volterra for and that's something that is lost to me forever. So save your sorrow and sympathy for someone who needs and wants it."
She left the room at that point, quietly closing his door and he closed his eyes and tried desperately to find the peace of sleep.
Esme closed her eyes in regret, leaning against the wall just outside Jasper's door. She had feared that he would close himself off completely, not only due to the ill-spoken words of her husband but also the presence of his brother who, it was obvious to her, was more than willing to become part of their family. She knew that Jasper would see this as a betrayal, and she understood his reasoning.
He had spent the first eight years of his life taking care of his obviously somewhat innocent and naïve brother.
He'd been taken away from the only person in his life that he loved, very much against his will. And now, he'd gotten that person back only to watch as he embraced fully , the very people who caused all his pain.
Yes, she could see it all plainly. But how could she help him? How could she possibly get through the walls that were now reinforced by fresh pain and resentment?
Shaking her head, she stood straight and made her way to her husbands study.
Knocking lightly, she entered and smiled, taking the hand that Carlisle held out to her. He pulled her down next to him on the couch and laid his book aside.
"Hello my love. I take it Jasper is back now?"
She sighed and nodded.
"He is. I'm very worried about him Carlisle. He won't admit it, but he's very hurt by how his brother took to us, and he didn't even witness most of it."
Carlisle scoffed and Esme furrowed her brow in confusion at his expression as she watched him shake his head slowly.
"Esme, I must admit to not understanding this whole situation in the least. Why didn't he simply tell us of his brother years ago? We could have brought him home with us also. They would have been together and safe. Instead he fought tooth and nail to get away, and then quietly left with the Volturi without saying a word of his brother. I know he was just a small child then Es, but if you ask me, he's guilty of abandoning his brother to his fate at that point."
Esme gasped at Carlisle's sentiment and jumped when the door crashed open, an enraged Jasper looming in the space.
"I'm guilty of abandoning my brother am I?! All you had to do was let me go back then and we would have gone on just fine! We would have been back together and perfectly happy, just as we had been!"
Carlisle stood, a dark expression on his face that Esme had never seen there before.
"I'm quite fed up with taking the blame for all of your woes Jasper. You were a child, yes, but you made bad decisions that led to your separation from your brother. You could have been raised together all of these years but you chose not to! You did that! No one else! And then you left with Caius, without uttering a word about your innocent brother, leaving him all alone in the forest to finish raising himself. You were the only one who could have changed that fate for your brother yet you chose not to!"
Jasper had tears of pain and anger coursing down his cheeks now.
"It was a promise! We made promises to each other and I wasn't about to go back on my word to my brother! We were all we had since our birth and I couldn't do that to him. So I finally accepted my fate and yes, I left him to his, but that was what we had decided!"
Carlisle moved to stand toe to toe with Jasper.
"Really Jasper? Was it really a mutual decision for you both or was it a case of your innocent and naïve brother merely following your directives just as he had done his entire life at that point? You knew he wasn't as sharp and worldly as you and yet you made a decision that kept him alone and secluded for all of these years! "
Esme watched in horror as every emotion drained from her distraught son and he became as cold as ice right before her eyes.
There was no pain or anger, there was simply steel resolve and he looked cold, icy cold.
He straightened himself and looked down at Carlisle, who was an inch or two shorter.
"I am done with you. You will never be anything to me."
He looked around at all of those now assembled due to the volume of the confrontation, including his brother.
Esme reached a hand out to him but he didn't even glance at her, his eyes locked on his brother.
"If you want these people, you may have them. I care naught. I will give you this year to make your decision, and then I shall leave for my home in Volterra, where I belong with my father, the King. The Volturi is my life and I am their Prince. I shall remain so until the day I ascend the throne in my fathers place."
His hardened jade eyes met and locked with Esme's and she felt her heart drop in dread.
"A year in the life of a vampire is nothing and when I leave here, this will be as a drop in my ocean of eternity, never to be spoken or thought of again."
She felt her heart break as the significance of his words was not lost on her. It was a direct denial of the connection they had made that day in the driveway and she felt the pain of her loss profoundly as he turned away once again to look at his brother.
He sneered out. "This time, it truly is your own choice. I'll not influence you in the least. Leave with me in a year or stay, it matters little to me. I would leave this very minute but I promised you this year and I never break my promises, just as my Father, the King has always taught me. Just have your decision made by the last day of the school year as I'll not wait one minute more."
So saying, he turned and left the room.
Peter, as they had named him, looked around at everyone with wide frightened eyes.
"What happened? Why was my brother so angry and cold? What did I do?"
His face crumpled into hurt confusion and Carlisle laid a hand on his shoulder.
"You've done nothing wrong son. Absolutely nothing."
He looked at his father. "But Papa, he acted like he hates me now. What will I do if my brother hates me now? I love him and I just got him back! What will I do?"
Carlisle could see that his son was becoming more upset by the moment and pulled him into a hug, smoothing his hair down.
"Shh, my son. Jasper's upset with me and not you, alright? He will be fine once he has a chance to recover from the argument we just had. It was just the heat of the moment, nothing more."
Esme pinned Carlisle with her gaze at that last statement and then looked away, shaking her head in regret.
She knew that this damage was of the lasting variety and wouldn't be easily mended now, if ever.
No, this day had wrought lasting breaches that would never be mended, she was sure. She just hoped that they didn't include any between her twin sons for Peter's was a very tender heart and she hated the thought of it being wounded or broken.
She was sure that if that happened, there would be profound changes in his innocent and ever optimistic personality and she didn't want to see that happen.
He was like a ray of sunshine in their lives and she longed for him to remain so.
She made her way to the door, taking her leave with the rest of the family who remained stoic and silent as they all went their separate ways once again with the exception of Carlisle and Peter.
They remained in Carlisle' s study, with father consoling son.
Esme found it very curious how they had taken to each other almost from the first moment they were introduced.
It seemed as though they fit each other's needs perfectly.
Carlisle had a great need to be a father in every way and Peter had a great need for guidance, acceptance and comfort, all things, she was sure that he used to get from his brother but had been missing for years now.
And she? What did she need?
She had a need to prevent her strong and brave son from falling by the wayside.
The brave and fierce little boy who had fought so hard to get back to his brother and when that didn't work, had accepted his fate and kept his word and his secret no matter the pain it had caused him.
No matter what her husband said, she saw her son's actions as the nobel acts that they were, and from such a small child too!
Looking back, she saw clearly what a little warrior and protector he was and still is.
She would honor that and not disparage it.
The next morning Esme was determined to speak to Jasper. She wanted to make her feelings known to him. He had to see that she, at least, thought his actions above reproach.
She found him just as he was entering the house from the back, several collapsed boxes under one arm.
"Jasper, may I speak with you?"
Hardened, haughty eyes pinned her as he shrugged one shoulder. "If you must. Follow me and have your say. I am busy, but I will listen as I work."
She followed but her curiosity got the best of her.
"What are you doing? Is it something I can help you with?"
Entering his room, he began constructing the cartons.
"Nothing I need help with. I am moving into the guest cottage. I will pay rent for my time there, up front, in cash today. I will leave it just as I found it at the end of the school year."
He looked at her. "It will be best for all concerned if I maintain a distance. I prefer it this way. I value my privacy and I find that I do not have that in this house. If you have objections to my renting the cottage, I will procure lodgings elsewhere in town until it's time for my return to Volterra."
She sighed and sat in the chair by the windows. "Oh Jasper. Please, I beg you, don't push me away my son. I love you."
He cut her off quickly.
"Please stop Esme. This will never work. You are forever tied to a man that I despise and that will never change. It is written in stone as far as I'm concerned. I was never meant to be a part of your little family and I'm perfectly happy with the family I do have. I love my mother the Queen and my father the King very much and wouldn't trade them for the world. You have spent these past many years thinking that you had one son; a son who hated you no less. Now you may have that one son, but a son who loves you and yours unconditionally. He is perfect for you and all of you for him. Be satisfied with that Esme and don't question it. Simply be grateful. You have lost nothing."
He went on then to begin packing.
Esme was wholly unsatisfied with what he had said.
"Jasper, just because we now have Peter here with us doesn't mean that we want or value you any less!"
He raised a hand, stopping her words.
"Do not mistake my words for an attempt to gain reassurance from you Esme. They were not. I need no such reassurances. Don't think that I need to hear how your heart is large enough to accommodate the both of us or any other such clichéd sentiment. I do not."
He turned back to packing and Esme felt an anger so pure it frightened her for a moment until she gave herself over to it and approached him quickly, grabbing his arm and spinning him to face her.
"You are my son. MINE. MY SON! You grew beneath my heart and I gave birth to you! I'LL NOT JUST FORGET THAT AND GO ON LIKE YOU'RE NOTHING, NO MATTER WHO ELSE MAY ENTER OUR LIVES! You Jasper, not your brother, you! You are my fierce little warrior who fought for what he loved and believed in with everything he was. You are my brave and nobel little boy that kept his word no matter the pain it cost him. You did that, and that should be admired and not scorned. You are and will always remain my son, flesh of my flesh and I love you and will always love you with a ferocity that matches that little warrior I met many years ago and the grown, proud Prince that stands before me today."
Jasper looked into her eyes and saw the truth burning in them and the fire of her soul as she bore it to him and he nodded and hugged her to him saying simply "I accept."
When he got home, he tried his best to slip in unnoticed but as usual for him it seemed, it was not to be.
Esme was waiting for him next to his bedroom door.
"Where have you been Jasper? I've been worried."
Heaving a sigh, he slipped past her and into his room, placing his bag down by the closet before flopping bonelessly on his bed.
"I've been out Esme. That's all you need to know."
He stared at the ceiling as she made her way to a chair and sat.
"Jasper honey, we just worry about you and want to know you're safe. Is that too much to ask?"
"Yes, it is Esme. I'm unused to accounting for every minute of my day to someone else. I'm used to being trusted enough to take care of myself for fuck sake. I'm Vampire and a trained fighter in multiple disciplines. I'm sure that I could kick every ass in this house many times over with minimal effort."
He looked at her finally.
"Now, how in the world are any of you going to protect me?"
She looked up from her hands that were clenched in her lap.
"That's how a family is run Jasper."
She chose to ignore his scoff at the word 'family'.
"They stay accountable to each other because they love and care for each other. It's not based on who can kick whose ass honey."
She smirked as he raised his brows at her language, she assumed. Before he could comment she continued.
"Now, I didn't seek you out to argue. I actually have a purpose. I would like to speak with you about contraception Jasper. Do you use condoms when you have sex?"
She noticed with growing humor that his brows had inched up even higher than before.
"Esme, I didn't know you had such brass balls when it comes to such subjects. I'm almost impressed."
He drawled out arrogantly as he stared up at the ceiling, hands behind his head.
She smirked. "You'll find there is lots that you don't know about me Jasper, just as there are many things I don't know about you. Hopefully we can come to know each other better. Now answer the question please." She sat back, crossing her legs, waiting.
"Not that it's any of your business but yes I do, when I am with a human. I prefer bareback with vampires; more sensation."
She rose from her seat and nodded.
"Wonderful. Just let me know if you run out. I can get more for you from your father if you have a need."
He scoffed. "Esme, I've been buying my own condoms since I was thirteen years old. Why in the world would I seek your assistance for such a thing now?"
This had shocked her.
"Jasper! thirteen?! I can't even imagine that you were mature enough to manage at that point!"
"Let's just say that Jane is not your typical fourteen year old Esme, and leave it at that."
"Oh Jasper, what sort of life you have lead my son."
Her voice shook with her emotion and his brow furrowed. He was determined not to get caught up in her emotions again.
Resentment filled him. No, he'd leave all that shit for his brother who seemed more than eager.
"Don't start with me Esme. I have loved my life for the most part and there is only one thing in this world that I would trade my years in Volterra for and that's something that is lost to me forever. So save your sorrow and sympathy for someone who needs and wants it."
She left the room at that point, quietly closing his door and he closed his eyes and tried desperately to find the peace of sleep.
Esme closed her eyes in regret, leaning against the wall just outside Jasper's door. She had feared that he would close himself off completely, not only due to the ill-spoken words of her husband but also the presence of his brother who, it was obvious to her, was more than willing to become part of their family. She knew that Jasper would see this as a betrayal, and she understood his reasoning.
He had spent the first eight years of his life taking care of his obviously somewhat innocent and naïve brother.
He'd been taken away from the only person in his life that he loved, very much against his will. And now, he'd gotten that person back only to watch as he embraced fully , the very people who caused all his pain.
Yes, she could see it all plainly. But how could she help him? How could she possibly get through the walls that were now reinforced by fresh pain and resentment?
Shaking her head, she stood straight and made her way to her husbands study.
Knocking lightly, she entered and smiled, taking the hand that Carlisle held out to her. He pulled her down next to him on the couch and laid his book aside.
"Hello my love. I take it Jasper is back now?"
She sighed and nodded.
"He is. I'm very worried about him Carlisle. He won't admit it, but he's very hurt by how his brother took to us, and he didn't even witness most of it."
Carlisle scoffed and Esme furrowed her brow in confusion at his expression as she watched him shake his head slowly.
"Esme, I must admit to not understanding this whole situation in the least. Why didn't he simply tell us of his brother years ago? We could have brought him home with us also. They would have been together and safe. Instead he fought tooth and nail to get away, and then quietly left with the Volturi without saying a word of his brother. I know he was just a small child then Es, but if you ask me, he's guilty of abandoning his brother to his fate at that point."
Esme gasped at Carlisle's sentiment and jumped when the door crashed open, an enraged Jasper looming in the space.
"I'm guilty of abandoning my brother am I?! All you had to do was let me go back then and we would have gone on just fine! We would have been back together and perfectly happy, just as we had been!"
Carlisle stood, a dark expression on his face that Esme had never seen there before.
"I'm quite fed up with taking the blame for all of your woes Jasper. You were a child, yes, but you made bad decisions that led to your separation from your brother. You could have been raised together all of these years but you chose not to! You did that! No one else! And then you left with Caius, without uttering a word about your innocent brother, leaving him all alone in the forest to finish raising himself. You were the only one who could have changed that fate for your brother yet you chose not to!"
Jasper had tears of pain and anger coursing down his cheeks now.
"It was a promise! We made promises to each other and I wasn't about to go back on my word to my brother! We were all we had since our birth and I couldn't do that to him. So I finally accepted my fate and yes, I left him to his, but that was what we had decided!"
Carlisle moved to stand toe to toe with Jasper.
"Really Jasper? Was it really a mutual decision for you both or was it a case of your innocent and naïve brother merely following your directives just as he had done his entire life at that point? You knew he wasn't as sharp and worldly as you and yet you made a decision that kept him alone and secluded for all of these years! "
Esme watched in horror as every emotion drained from her distraught son and he became as cold as ice right before her eyes.
There was no pain or anger, there was simply steel resolve and he looked cold, icy cold.
He straightened himself and looked down at Carlisle, who was an inch or two shorter.
"I am done with you. You will never be anything to me."
He looked around at all of those now assembled due to the volume of the confrontation, including his brother.
Esme reached a hand out to him but he didn't even glance at her, his eyes locked on his brother.
"If you want these people, you may have them. I care naught. I will give you this year to make your decision, and then I shall leave for my home in Volterra, where I belong with my father, the King. The Volturi is my life and I am their Prince. I shall remain so until the day I ascend the throne in my fathers place."
His hardened jade eyes met and locked with Esme's and she felt her heart drop in dread.
"A year in the life of a vampire is nothing and when I leave here, this will be as a drop in my ocean of eternity, never to be spoken or thought of again."
She felt her heart break as the significance of his words was not lost on her. It was a direct denial of the connection they had made that day in the driveway and she felt the pain of her loss profoundly as he turned away once again to look at his brother.
He sneered out. "This time, it truly is your own choice. I'll not influence you in the least. Leave with me in a year or stay, it matters little to me. I would leave this very minute but I promised you this year and I never break my promises, just as my Father, the King has always taught me. Just have your decision made by the last day of the school year as I'll not wait one minute more."
So saying, he turned and left the room.
Peter, as they had named him, looked around at everyone with wide frightened eyes.
"What happened? Why was my brother so angry and cold? What did I do?"
His face crumpled into hurt confusion and Carlisle laid a hand on his shoulder.
"You've done nothing wrong son. Absolutely nothing."
He looked at his father. "But Papa, he acted like he hates me now. What will I do if my brother hates me now? I love him and I just got him back! What will I do?"
Carlisle could see that his son was becoming more upset by the moment and pulled him into a hug, smoothing his hair down.
"Shh, my son. Jasper's upset with me and not you, alright? He will be fine once he has a chance to recover from the argument we just had. It was just the heat of the moment, nothing more."
Esme pinned Carlisle with her gaze at that last statement and then looked away, shaking her head in regret.
She knew that this damage was of the lasting variety and wouldn't be easily mended now, if ever.
No, this day had wrought lasting breaches that would never be mended, she was sure. She just hoped that they didn't include any between her twin sons for Peter's was a very tender heart and she hated the thought of it being wounded or broken.
She was sure that if that happened, there would be profound changes in his innocent and ever optimistic personality and she didn't want to see that happen.
He was like a ray of sunshine in their lives and she longed for him to remain so.
She made her way to the door, taking her leave with the rest of the family who remained stoic and silent as they all went their separate ways once again with the exception of Carlisle and Peter.
They remained in Carlisle' s study, with father consoling son.
Esme found it very curious how they had taken to each other almost from the first moment they were introduced.
It seemed as though they fit each other's needs perfectly.
Carlisle had a great need to be a father in every way and Peter had a great need for guidance, acceptance and comfort, all things, she was sure that he used to get from his brother but had been missing for years now.
And she? What did she need?
She had a need to prevent her strong and brave son from falling by the wayside.
The brave and fierce little boy who had fought so hard to get back to his brother and when that didn't work, had accepted his fate and kept his word and his secret no matter the pain it had caused him.
No matter what her husband said, she saw her son's actions as the nobel acts that they were, and from such a small child too!
Looking back, she saw clearly what a little warrior and protector he was and still is.
She would honor that and not disparage it.
The next morning Esme was determined to speak to Jasper. She wanted to make her feelings known to him. He had to see that she, at least, thought his actions above reproach.
She found him just as he was entering the house from the back, several collapsed boxes under one arm.
"Jasper, may I speak with you?"
Hardened, haughty eyes pinned her as he shrugged one shoulder. "If you must. Follow me and have your say. I am busy, but I will listen as I work."
She followed but her curiosity got the best of her.
"What are you doing? Is it something I can help you with?"
Entering his room, he began constructing the cartons.
"Nothing I need help with. I am moving into the guest cottage. I will pay rent for my time there, up front, in cash today. I will leave it just as I found it at the end of the school year."
He looked at her. "It will be best for all concerned if I maintain a distance. I prefer it this way. I value my privacy and I find that I do not have that in this house. If you have objections to my renting the cottage, I will procure lodgings elsewhere in town until it's time for my return to Volterra."
She sighed and sat in the chair by the windows. "Oh Jasper. Please, I beg you, don't push me away my son. I love you."
He cut her off quickly.
"Please stop Esme. This will never work. You are forever tied to a man that I despise and that will never change. It is written in stone as far as I'm concerned. I was never meant to be a part of your little family and I'm perfectly happy with the family I do have. I love my mother the Queen and my father the King very much and wouldn't trade them for the world. You have spent these past many years thinking that you had one son; a son who hated you no less. Now you may have that one son, but a son who loves you and yours unconditionally. He is perfect for you and all of you for him. Be satisfied with that Esme and don't question it. Simply be grateful. You have lost nothing."
He went on then to begin packing.
Esme was wholly unsatisfied with what he had said.
"Jasper, just because we now have Peter here with us doesn't mean that we want or value you any less!"
He raised a hand, stopping her words.
"Do not mistake my words for an attempt to gain reassurance from you Esme. They were not. I need no such reassurances. Don't think that I need to hear how your heart is large enough to accommodate the both of us or any other such clichéd sentiment. I do not."
He turned back to packing and Esme felt an anger so pure it frightened her for a moment until she gave herself over to it and approached him quickly, grabbing his arm and spinning him to face her.
"You are my son. MINE. MY SON! You grew beneath my heart and I gave birth to you! I'LL NOT JUST FORGET THAT AND GO ON LIKE YOU'RE NOTHING, NO MATTER WHO ELSE MAY ENTER OUR LIVES! You Jasper, not your brother, you! You are my fierce little warrior who fought for what he loved and believed in with everything he was. You are my brave and nobel little boy that kept his word no matter the pain it cost him. You did that, and that should be admired and not scorned. You are and will always remain my son, flesh of my flesh and I love you and will always love you with a ferocity that matches that little warrior I met many years ago and the grown, proud Prince that stands before me today."
Jasper looked into her eyes and saw the truth burning in them and the fire of her soul as she bore it to him and he nodded and hugged her to him saying simply "I accept."
DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.