Isla de Cascadas Hermosas
by Wizardtho
Chapter 03:
I rubbed the spot on my chest unconsciously, a deep ache throbbing under the skin again. I only realised what I was doing when Eleazar pulled my hand away to kiss my fingertips. His eyes were practically swirling with emotion as he said, “That will not happen, Isabella. Not ever, if I have any say in the matter. The same goes for the Volturi. They won't find you. I will keep you safe.”
He thought for a moment as he looked at me, then said, “I can smell the trapped traces of venom in your system. The spot you were rubbing is one of them. Do you mind me asking if you have noticed anything other than your wounds not healing well?”
I let out a breath, then thought back through everything. Thinking out loud, I happened to say after a few minutes, “There was my eyesight. Just before my birthday, I was dreading the thought of telling Charlie I needed to see an eye doctor. I love reading, but the words on the pages had started becoming a bit fuzzy. After I was taken off all of the loopy drugs, I noticed that everything seemed almost too sharp. I figured it was because I was on so many drugs during my recuperation, that when I was taken off of them I just needed to readjust... but I haven't had fuzzy vision when reading since then. There was my sixth sense, as I've come to label it. It was weird, but I always knew when there was a wolf or vampire nearby. It always like someone was staring me in the back of the head, or as if the hair on my arms stood straight up. Then the sky-high libido…”
I mumbled the last sentence, then realized what I had just blurted out, smacking my hand over my mouth as my eyes widened. Eleazar chuckled, then took my hand from my mouth to kiss my palm. “No embarrassment with me, remember? It is quite normal, Poco Paloma, I assure you. Vampires have extremely high sex drives. My question is this... did you end up wearing out a few human partners, or did a member of the pack become your lover to sate your rising desire?”
I blushed from head to toe at his blatant question, then shook my head, mumbling as I hid my face in my hands. “Neither. No vampire lovers, either, since that will likely be your next question.”
Eleazar's breath hitched, then he looked at me curiously. I saw him through my fingers, and after a second, I couldn't take it anymore. “What?”
He shook his head, asking in all seriousness, “Not to be blunt, but I am trying to put the pieces together. Your senses have heightened, your body is acting like a vampire's does when bitten by a foreign vampire, and you've admitted that your libido has risen tremendously... yet you took no lover to sate your needs? How often during a day did you need gratification after your incident verses before?”
I stood up quickly, then started pacing, knowing I wouldn't get out of this conversation easily. After a full two minutes, I stopped and whipped around to face him, blurting out, “Look... I've never... Edward was my first anything... but he always insisted it was too dangerous with me being his singer, so we didn't. Ugggh... this is not coming out right. Before, the urge was unbearable maybe a couple of times a week... normal human teen female... and taken care of during Edward's hunts. After I started recovering, it seemed like I couldn't get away from the urges. At first I thought something got messed up with me, because it wasn't working like it did before. But the desire just kept building. That’s when I noticed it took several more than it used to each time, to satisfy myself.”
Eleazar stood and came to me, then gently wrapped his arms around my stressed-out form. He whispered into the top of my hair as he tenderly rubbed my back, “I apologize, Sweetheart. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable with my questions. I am used to living in a house with four females, two of which are succubi, another who is now mated but was a former lover. Sex is an ongoing open topic in the house, so I am accustomed to being quite open about it.”
He lifted my chin with his index finger, whispering softly, “Never be ashamed for waiting, no matter the reason. I wish I'd had the strength to wait for my mate. Sadly, being without companionship for over a century can wear on even the strongest of vampires. You can change the topic without fear of upsetting me, but I am curious. Why did you not seek out someone after you started recuperating?”
I let out a breath, but didn't avert my eyes from his. “I always felt plain before, but after, I just... I didn't want anyone to see me... not even any of the pack members. They'd all seen what I looked like at the scene through the mind link, but with all of the blood, it would have been too hard to tell exactly how bad my injuries were. I just couldn't... so I've learned to live with the frustration of going it alone, so to speak.”
He pressed his forehead to mine, whispering, “You are one of the strongest and most beautiful creatures I've ever seen, Bella. How can I make you see yourself clearly?”
I went to shake my head, wanting to refute what he was saying, but he quickly pressed his lips to my temple before backing up, only to whip his shirt over his head. My breath hitched at how drop-dead gorgeous he was, but as I scanned his defined abs and prominent V, I noticed the myriad of slightly raised lines and bite impressions that glimmered just a bit brighter than the rest of him. My eyes welled up with tears as I unthinkingly traced a line as well as a bite mark with the tips of my fingers, then I choked out while looking up into his soft smile, “Who did this to you?”
Eleazar picked me up bridal-style, then sat with me on the couch again. Once he was settled with me on his lap, he kissed my palm, then placed it back on his chest while saying, “My life had a beginning closer to Jasper's than Edward's, Isabella. Do you know of their stories?”
I shook my head, “Only Edward's -and Carlisle likes to tell me of his life. I don't know Jasper's, though.”
He nodded, then said sadly, “When I was turned, it was by a small coven in Spain. Only thirty years after my turning, my maker and his mate were exposed, being caught briefly in the sun. The Volturi came, and it was deemed that our whole coven was a risk. As punishment, my maker and his mate were burned, but my coven mate and I were sentenced to a term of service in the Volturi ranks. Mariana and I were split up as soon as we arrived, so I could not protect her.”
He gave me a sad smile again, then offered, “Life in the Volturi is not as they make it out to be. I quickly found out the harsh reality of the world I was thrown into. I was coveted by the kings for my gift, yet Mariana was left to the proverbial wolves, simply because she didn't have a useful power. I was often sent out on missions, to detect any gifts the enemy may possess. More often than not, my speaking up was what tipped the scale on whether someone was made to serve them or died. They were becoming greedy... power hungry. I started watching, then noticed a pattern. If there were rumors of a gifted vampire in a coven, the brothers -particularly Aro- would have some of the guards keep an eye on that coven. Even the slightest of misdeeds would be reason enough to warrant a 'visit' from a guard contingent that included him and myself. His decisions were never made until I told him of anyone with powers, and they were always the ones spared.”
I whispered that it wasn't his fault... that he was forced to serve them. He kissed my hair before continuing. “By that time, Aro trusted me enough that he never touched me, so I saved as many as I could. He has only spared Carlisle's family this long because of his past with Aro. Either way...”
He touched my fingertips, which were tracing all of the different scars on his chest, “... these are all from either guard training that got out of hand, or fights that happened during those coven visits. You say you aren't beautiful because of your scars, but they make you all the more beautiful to me, because they show me you are strong. You have known great suffering, yet you are strong enough to surpass it. Do my scars make me any less desirable?”
His last sentence was but a whisper, causing me to gasp at the implication that he could be anything less than absolutely mouthwatering. My eyes shot to his in horror as I gasped out, “No! Eleazar, no. I didn't mean... most humans don't think like that. They wouldn't take the time to see past the scars. I didn't want to chance being with a human for that reason, plus I didn't want a pack member to have to relive the way I was found anytime they were with me.”
Eleazar brushed my hair away from my face. I was confused by the look in his eyes. A sudden longing rose in me to just kiss him senseless, but then my heart ached remembering Edward. Instead, I kissed his cheek with a whispered, “I could never think you are anything less than completely sexy, but it’s time to change the subject. Snack time for the human.”
He let out a breath, kissed my cheek in return, then whispered in my ear as he gently squeezed my hips, “As are you, Isabella. Come. I'll fix you a snack while you pour us more wine.”
Eleazar had fixed me a wonderful snack of cheese block slices, crackers, and slices of a sweet sausage. I actually found myself eating most of it while we talked. At one point, I finally gave into my curiosity to ask, “Poco Paloma... you seem to like calling me it, and your Spanish roots would suggest it's a Spanish term. What does it mean?”
I was already four glasses of wine in by that time, so my natural inhibitions had flown out the window. He gave me a truly beautiful smile, then cupped my cheek as he said, “It's European dialect Spanish, in fact, and it translates to a term of endearment meaning Little Dove.”
My cheeks heated considerably at him calling me such. In response, he trailed his fingers along my cheekbone while whispering, “Beautiful, Little Dove.”
My eyes fluttered at the feeling, but when my arousal heightened at his sensual touch, I had to bite back the whimper that wanted to escape. His fingers trailed from my cheek to my collarbone, and my breath hitched at his husky whisper in my ear, “When you are ready to come to me, Isabella, I promise to make sure you are completely sated. Make no mistake; I would have you crying out my name in ecstasy. All you have to do is come to me when you are ready.”
With a whoosh of air, I opened my eyes to find him gone.
That night, though my fantasies had always been of Edward, I found them morphing. Images of Eleazar mixed and swirled with ones of Edward. I couldn't seem to focus on only Edward. I was shocked to hear myself whimper Eleazar's name when a severely intense orgasm rocked through me, and laid there panting when I felt that 'near' feeling. I stood on shaky legs, pulled my robe on before loosely tying it, then walked over to my balcony.
As I looked down, I could clearly see Eleazar's gloriously naked form coming up from under the water in the pool. He was faced away from me, but my breath hitched at the sight of him when he dove back underwater to start swimming. The strong muscles of his back led to the sexiest set of dimples just above his drool-worthy ass.
Though I was positive he knew I was watching him, he made no indication that he knew. The whole situation was quite erotic, and I found myself untying my robe, giving into my urges yet again while watching him.
I was utterly mortified by my actions the next morning when I woke, but Eleazar was determined not to give me a chance to hide out in my room. Thankfully, he chose not to mention my voyeuristic self-pleasure session the previous night, but it didn't stop me from freaking completely on the inside. He told me he wanted to show me something, and to make sure I had a bikini on. I slipped back into what I wore the night before, then slid into a pair of flat David Tate white sandals.
Exploring the island with Eleazar was both an amazing and a sexually frustrating experience. He had ended up taking me to one of the many hidden falls, which was in a beautifully secluded cove type area. As we played in the clear blue water, images of him the previous night would randomly pop into my head, making my desire rapidly shoot up at any moment. Then he would press his body to mine and twirl me in the water, or swim close to brush his fingers along my waist, which only made my situation worse.
Needless to say, even though I was completely worn out when we got back to the house, I couldn't fall asleep until after I succumbed to three spine-tingling orgasms that featured Eleazar as the star in my thoughts.
I woke in the middle of the night, panting and sticky, the erotic dream of being with Eleazar still lingering at the edge of my mind. I was wet beyond belief with arousal, but after 45 minutes of replaying the dream as well as my fantasies in my mind, I still couldn't seem to orgasm. I growled out a frustrated breath. Without taking the time to clean up a bit, I threw my robe on, then stalked down toward the kitchen.
I didn't even realize I wasn't alone until I was mumbling obscenities under my breath as I filled a glass with water. I gasped at the kiss to my damp neck, then Eleazar's husky voice next to my ear, “Are you alright, Poco Paloma?”
I groaned, then shook my head, “Mmm... bad night.”
I blushed when he inhaled deeply along my skin, knowing what he must be scenting, but he growled slightly before moaning against my neck. In the next second, he lifted my right hand to his mouth, kissed my fingertips, then groaned, “God, how I want to taste you. Tell me what's bothering you, Sweetheart, when I can smell your arousal flooding all the air around you... as well as your saturating your fingers. Are you not sated?”
I whimpered as his tongue wrapped around the index and middle fingers of my right hand, tasting my arousal, then whooshed out, “Not working. I can't... but I don't know why.”
Eleazar's eyes closed as a deep rumble filled his chest, then after sucking on my fingers for a minute, he released them to whisper into my neck, “Please, Isabella... tell me. I promise to never make you regret it.”
Edward's face filled my vision suddenly, causing me to freeze. I couldn't, no matter how much I wanted to. I still loved Edward, and it was too soon... wasn't it? It practically broke me to leave him standing there, but I shook my head, dashing up the stairs without a word.
I didn't get back to sleep that night, or at all the next night.
For the next two weeks after that, I explored many places on the island with Eleazar. It was torture... pure sexual frustration. He would say something erotic, or brush his fingers along my neck or ribs, and my arousal would skyrocket as a result. There were so many times that I wanted to give in... to let go, to find that ultimate pleasure in his arms... but I always felt guilty.
I was having another bad night. I was shocked when I faintly heard Eleazar talking to Carlisle on speaker phone in his study, when I came down to fix myself something to eat. Carlisle was asking him how everything was going, then Eleazar sighed in reply, “Not well, I'm afraid. You knew of our connection instantly on the docks, my friend, but Bella must not be feeling it. I can't heal her until we are intimate, and I believe she is still mourning Edward. I thought that if I put myself out there, she might feel our connection... but either she doesn't sense it with everything she's been through, or she won't let herself acknowledge it out of obligation to young Edward.”
Carlisle sighed, then I heard a shuffling that sounded like papers. “Eleazar, maybe I should have one of the girls call her, to find out why she isn't feeling your mating bond. I know this must be pure torture on you right now, what with not being able to immerse yourself in the scent and feel of her, but there's no moving forward until we find out what the issue is. I also understand you must be producing the healing substance in vast quantities, due to her injuries, but please be patient. I will try to find out what the cause for her hesitation is.”
Wait, what?! What in the... did Carlisle just say Eleazar and I were mates? Eleazar's producing a healing substance when we haven't even kissed?
I quickly but quietly made my way back up to my room, then dialed Alice's phone number, whispering as soon as she picked up, “Ali? I don't... please... what do I do?”
I was shaking like a leaf, not understanding how all of this happened. She cooed at the panic in my tone, “Oh, Sweetie... I'm here. Let's talk this through calmly, then we'll figure it out together, okay?”
I nodded, taking a breath before I whispered, “Okay. Ali, I'm seriously confused, ever since I got here. Eleazar and I connected as soon as we met practically, which freaks me out a little. A part of me still loves Edward, and feels like it would be cheating on him, even though he left me. This thing with Eleazar, though... it's almost too much. I can sense him, plus anytime he touches me -even the most innocent brush of his fingers- my whole body ignites with desire. I'm stuck, Ali, help.”
She chuckled, then hummed for a second. When she finally spoke, she asked, “Did Edward ever make you feel like Eleazar does, when he touched you?”
I shook my head, “No. I did feel it when he kissed or touched me, but not nearly as intense as this. Eleazar hasn’t even kissed me, yet it’s so intense.”
I could hear her smile in her voice as she asked, “And you know that vampires are not held to the standards of humans as far as grieving, right? Bella, I loved my brother fiercely. I always will, but he wasn't the right one for you. I don't want you to spend the rest of your life missing out on something truly amazing, because of some misguided loyalty to a man who ended your relationship months before his death. Yes, you will always love him. That's expected, but would he have wanted you to never move on after he left you?”
Harsh as she made it sound, Alice was always straight to the point. Plus, she was right this time, damn it. “You're right. I know you are, but... can I really get into another relationship with a vampire? I wouldn't live through it if I did and was left again, Ali. Whatever this is between Eleazar and I... it's explosive. Can I trust that it’s real, or is it just because of whatever lingering venom is trapped in me? I know I'm not strong enough to resist giving myself to him completely if I go to him, Ali. It practically broke me to leave him standing there two weeks ago. It's only gotten harder to turn away from him since then.”
Alice chuckled, then offered, “That’s the way with mates, Bells. You should have seen Em and Rose’s first months. She was fighting her desire for him the second she saw him, because of her past. He was fighting his because he didn't want to scare her. Thankfully, it didn't take long for them to realise they were mates. They were fully immersing in their mating bond just hours later, after they finally came to their senses. Do me a favor, Sweetie. Clear your mind of everything, then tell me what your instincts are practically screaming for you to do.”
I let out a whooshed breath, then closed my eyes to do as she asked. Everything in me was begging to go to Eleazar. My heart ached that I kept walking away from him. I walked out onto my balcony, the sight of him in the pool naked again calling to me. With that, I rushed to say, “I need to go to him, Ali. Thanks. Give Jasper a kiss for me.”
I rubbed the spot on my chest unconsciously, a deep ache throbbing under the skin again. I only realised what I was doing when Eleazar pulled my hand away to kiss my fingertips. His eyes were practically swirling with emotion as he said, “That will not happen, Isabella. Not ever, if I have any say in the matter. The same goes for the Volturi. They won't find you. I will keep you safe.”
He thought for a moment as he looked at me, then said, “I can smell the trapped traces of venom in your system. The spot you were rubbing is one of them. Do you mind me asking if you have noticed anything other than your wounds not healing well?”
I let out a breath, then thought back through everything. Thinking out loud, I happened to say after a few minutes, “There was my eyesight. Just before my birthday, I was dreading the thought of telling Charlie I needed to see an eye doctor. I love reading, but the words on the pages had started becoming a bit fuzzy. After I was taken off all of the loopy drugs, I noticed that everything seemed almost too sharp. I figured it was because I was on so many drugs during my recuperation, that when I was taken off of them I just needed to readjust... but I haven't had fuzzy vision when reading since then. There was my sixth sense, as I've come to label it. It was weird, but I always knew when there was a wolf or vampire nearby. It always like someone was staring me in the back of the head, or as if the hair on my arms stood straight up. Then the sky-high libido…”
I mumbled the last sentence, then realized what I had just blurted out, smacking my hand over my mouth as my eyes widened. Eleazar chuckled, then took my hand from my mouth to kiss my palm. “No embarrassment with me, remember? It is quite normal, Poco Paloma, I assure you. Vampires have extremely high sex drives. My question is this... did you end up wearing out a few human partners, or did a member of the pack become your lover to sate your rising desire?”
I blushed from head to toe at his blatant question, then shook my head, mumbling as I hid my face in my hands. “Neither. No vampire lovers, either, since that will likely be your next question.”
Eleazar's breath hitched, then he looked at me curiously. I saw him through my fingers, and after a second, I couldn't take it anymore. “What?”
He shook his head, asking in all seriousness, “Not to be blunt, but I am trying to put the pieces together. Your senses have heightened, your body is acting like a vampire's does when bitten by a foreign vampire, and you've admitted that your libido has risen tremendously... yet you took no lover to sate your needs? How often during a day did you need gratification after your incident verses before?”
I stood up quickly, then started pacing, knowing I wouldn't get out of this conversation easily. After a full two minutes, I stopped and whipped around to face him, blurting out, “Look... I've never... Edward was my first anything... but he always insisted it was too dangerous with me being his singer, so we didn't. Ugggh... this is not coming out right. Before, the urge was unbearable maybe a couple of times a week... normal human teen female... and taken care of during Edward's hunts. After I started recovering, it seemed like I couldn't get away from the urges. At first I thought something got messed up with me, because it wasn't working like it did before. But the desire just kept building. That’s when I noticed it took several more than it used to each time, to satisfy myself.”
Eleazar stood and came to me, then gently wrapped his arms around my stressed-out form. He whispered into the top of my hair as he tenderly rubbed my back, “I apologize, Sweetheart. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable with my questions. I am used to living in a house with four females, two of which are succubi, another who is now mated but was a former lover. Sex is an ongoing open topic in the house, so I am accustomed to being quite open about it.”
He lifted my chin with his index finger, whispering softly, “Never be ashamed for waiting, no matter the reason. I wish I'd had the strength to wait for my mate. Sadly, being without companionship for over a century can wear on even the strongest of vampires. You can change the topic without fear of upsetting me, but I am curious. Why did you not seek out someone after you started recuperating?”
I let out a breath, but didn't avert my eyes from his. “I always felt plain before, but after, I just... I didn't want anyone to see me... not even any of the pack members. They'd all seen what I looked like at the scene through the mind link, but with all of the blood, it would have been too hard to tell exactly how bad my injuries were. I just couldn't... so I've learned to live with the frustration of going it alone, so to speak.”
He pressed his forehead to mine, whispering, “You are one of the strongest and most beautiful creatures I've ever seen, Bella. How can I make you see yourself clearly?”
I went to shake my head, wanting to refute what he was saying, but he quickly pressed his lips to my temple before backing up, only to whip his shirt over his head. My breath hitched at how drop-dead gorgeous he was, but as I scanned his defined abs and prominent V, I noticed the myriad of slightly raised lines and bite impressions that glimmered just a bit brighter than the rest of him. My eyes welled up with tears as I unthinkingly traced a line as well as a bite mark with the tips of my fingers, then I choked out while looking up into his soft smile, “Who did this to you?”
Eleazar picked me up bridal-style, then sat with me on the couch again. Once he was settled with me on his lap, he kissed my palm, then placed it back on his chest while saying, “My life had a beginning closer to Jasper's than Edward's, Isabella. Do you know of their stories?”
I shook my head, “Only Edward's -and Carlisle likes to tell me of his life. I don't know Jasper's, though.”
He nodded, then said sadly, “When I was turned, it was by a small coven in Spain. Only thirty years after my turning, my maker and his mate were exposed, being caught briefly in the sun. The Volturi came, and it was deemed that our whole coven was a risk. As punishment, my maker and his mate were burned, but my coven mate and I were sentenced to a term of service in the Volturi ranks. Mariana and I were split up as soon as we arrived, so I could not protect her.”
He gave me a sad smile again, then offered, “Life in the Volturi is not as they make it out to be. I quickly found out the harsh reality of the world I was thrown into. I was coveted by the kings for my gift, yet Mariana was left to the proverbial wolves, simply because she didn't have a useful power. I was often sent out on missions, to detect any gifts the enemy may possess. More often than not, my speaking up was what tipped the scale on whether someone was made to serve them or died. They were becoming greedy... power hungry. I started watching, then noticed a pattern. If there were rumors of a gifted vampire in a coven, the brothers -particularly Aro- would have some of the guards keep an eye on that coven. Even the slightest of misdeeds would be reason enough to warrant a 'visit' from a guard contingent that included him and myself. His decisions were never made until I told him of anyone with powers, and they were always the ones spared.”
I whispered that it wasn't his fault... that he was forced to serve them. He kissed my hair before continuing. “By that time, Aro trusted me enough that he never touched me, so I saved as many as I could. He has only spared Carlisle's family this long because of his past with Aro. Either way...”
He touched my fingertips, which were tracing all of the different scars on his chest, “... these are all from either guard training that got out of hand, or fights that happened during those coven visits. You say you aren't beautiful because of your scars, but they make you all the more beautiful to me, because they show me you are strong. You have known great suffering, yet you are strong enough to surpass it. Do my scars make me any less desirable?”
His last sentence was but a whisper, causing me to gasp at the implication that he could be anything less than absolutely mouthwatering. My eyes shot to his in horror as I gasped out, “No! Eleazar, no. I didn't mean... most humans don't think like that. They wouldn't take the time to see past the scars. I didn't want to chance being with a human for that reason, plus I didn't want a pack member to have to relive the way I was found anytime they were with me.”
Eleazar brushed my hair away from my face. I was confused by the look in his eyes. A sudden longing rose in me to just kiss him senseless, but then my heart ached remembering Edward. Instead, I kissed his cheek with a whispered, “I could never think you are anything less than completely sexy, but it’s time to change the subject. Snack time for the human.”
He let out a breath, kissed my cheek in return, then whispered in my ear as he gently squeezed my hips, “As are you, Isabella. Come. I'll fix you a snack while you pour us more wine.”
Eleazar had fixed me a wonderful snack of cheese block slices, crackers, and slices of a sweet sausage. I actually found myself eating most of it while we talked. At one point, I finally gave into my curiosity to ask, “Poco Paloma... you seem to like calling me it, and your Spanish roots would suggest it's a Spanish term. What does it mean?”
I was already four glasses of wine in by that time, so my natural inhibitions had flown out the window. He gave me a truly beautiful smile, then cupped my cheek as he said, “It's European dialect Spanish, in fact, and it translates to a term of endearment meaning Little Dove.”
My cheeks heated considerably at him calling me such. In response, he trailed his fingers along my cheekbone while whispering, “Beautiful, Little Dove.”
My eyes fluttered at the feeling, but when my arousal heightened at his sensual touch, I had to bite back the whimper that wanted to escape. His fingers trailed from my cheek to my collarbone, and my breath hitched at his husky whisper in my ear, “When you are ready to come to me, Isabella, I promise to make sure you are completely sated. Make no mistake; I would have you crying out my name in ecstasy. All you have to do is come to me when you are ready.”
With a whoosh of air, I opened my eyes to find him gone.
That night, though my fantasies had always been of Edward, I found them morphing. Images of Eleazar mixed and swirled with ones of Edward. I couldn't seem to focus on only Edward. I was shocked to hear myself whimper Eleazar's name when a severely intense orgasm rocked through me, and laid there panting when I felt that 'near' feeling. I stood on shaky legs, pulled my robe on before loosely tying it, then walked over to my balcony.
As I looked down, I could clearly see Eleazar's gloriously naked form coming up from under the water in the pool. He was faced away from me, but my breath hitched at the sight of him when he dove back underwater to start swimming. The strong muscles of his back led to the sexiest set of dimples just above his drool-worthy ass.
Though I was positive he knew I was watching him, he made no indication that he knew. The whole situation was quite erotic, and I found myself untying my robe, giving into my urges yet again while watching him.
I was utterly mortified by my actions the next morning when I woke, but Eleazar was determined not to give me a chance to hide out in my room. Thankfully, he chose not to mention my voyeuristic self-pleasure session the previous night, but it didn't stop me from freaking completely on the inside. He told me he wanted to show me something, and to make sure I had a bikini on. I slipped back into what I wore the night before, then slid into a pair of flat David Tate white sandals.
Exploring the island with Eleazar was both an amazing and a sexually frustrating experience. He had ended up taking me to one of the many hidden falls, which was in a beautifully secluded cove type area. As we played in the clear blue water, images of him the previous night would randomly pop into my head, making my desire rapidly shoot up at any moment. Then he would press his body to mine and twirl me in the water, or swim close to brush his fingers along my waist, which only made my situation worse.
Needless to say, even though I was completely worn out when we got back to the house, I couldn't fall asleep until after I succumbed to three spine-tingling orgasms that featured Eleazar as the star in my thoughts.
I woke in the middle of the night, panting and sticky, the erotic dream of being with Eleazar still lingering at the edge of my mind. I was wet beyond belief with arousal, but after 45 minutes of replaying the dream as well as my fantasies in my mind, I still couldn't seem to orgasm. I growled out a frustrated breath. Without taking the time to clean up a bit, I threw my robe on, then stalked down toward the kitchen.
I didn't even realize I wasn't alone until I was mumbling obscenities under my breath as I filled a glass with water. I gasped at the kiss to my damp neck, then Eleazar's husky voice next to my ear, “Are you alright, Poco Paloma?”
I groaned, then shook my head, “Mmm... bad night.”
I blushed when he inhaled deeply along my skin, knowing what he must be scenting, but he growled slightly before moaning against my neck. In the next second, he lifted my right hand to his mouth, kissed my fingertips, then groaned, “God, how I want to taste you. Tell me what's bothering you, Sweetheart, when I can smell your arousal flooding all the air around you... as well as your saturating your fingers. Are you not sated?”
I whimpered as his tongue wrapped around the index and middle fingers of my right hand, tasting my arousal, then whooshed out, “Not working. I can't... but I don't know why.”
Eleazar's eyes closed as a deep rumble filled his chest, then after sucking on my fingers for a minute, he released them to whisper into my neck, “Please, Isabella... tell me. I promise to never make you regret it.”
Edward's face filled my vision suddenly, causing me to freeze. I couldn't, no matter how much I wanted to. I still loved Edward, and it was too soon... wasn't it? It practically broke me to leave him standing there, but I shook my head, dashing up the stairs without a word.
I didn't get back to sleep that night, or at all the next night.
For the next two weeks after that, I explored many places on the island with Eleazar. It was torture... pure sexual frustration. He would say something erotic, or brush his fingers along my neck or ribs, and my arousal would skyrocket as a result. There were so many times that I wanted to give in... to let go, to find that ultimate pleasure in his arms... but I always felt guilty.
I was having another bad night. I was shocked when I faintly heard Eleazar talking to Carlisle on speaker phone in his study, when I came down to fix myself something to eat. Carlisle was asking him how everything was going, then Eleazar sighed in reply, “Not well, I'm afraid. You knew of our connection instantly on the docks, my friend, but Bella must not be feeling it. I can't heal her until we are intimate, and I believe she is still mourning Edward. I thought that if I put myself out there, she might feel our connection... but either she doesn't sense it with everything she's been through, or she won't let herself acknowledge it out of obligation to young Edward.”
Carlisle sighed, then I heard a shuffling that sounded like papers. “Eleazar, maybe I should have one of the girls call her, to find out why she isn't feeling your mating bond. I know this must be pure torture on you right now, what with not being able to immerse yourself in the scent and feel of her, but there's no moving forward until we find out what the issue is. I also understand you must be producing the healing substance in vast quantities, due to her injuries, but please be patient. I will try to find out what the cause for her hesitation is.”
Wait, what?! What in the... did Carlisle just say Eleazar and I were mates? Eleazar's producing a healing substance when we haven't even kissed?
I quickly but quietly made my way back up to my room, then dialed Alice's phone number, whispering as soon as she picked up, “Ali? I don't... please... what do I do?”
I was shaking like a leaf, not understanding how all of this happened. She cooed at the panic in my tone, “Oh, Sweetie... I'm here. Let's talk this through calmly, then we'll figure it out together, okay?”
I nodded, taking a breath before I whispered, “Okay. Ali, I'm seriously confused, ever since I got here. Eleazar and I connected as soon as we met practically, which freaks me out a little. A part of me still loves Edward, and feels like it would be cheating on him, even though he left me. This thing with Eleazar, though... it's almost too much. I can sense him, plus anytime he touches me -even the most innocent brush of his fingers- my whole body ignites with desire. I'm stuck, Ali, help.”
She chuckled, then hummed for a second. When she finally spoke, she asked, “Did Edward ever make you feel like Eleazar does, when he touched you?”
I shook my head, “No. I did feel it when he kissed or touched me, but not nearly as intense as this. Eleazar hasn’t even kissed me, yet it’s so intense.”
I could hear her smile in her voice as she asked, “And you know that vampires are not held to the standards of humans as far as grieving, right? Bella, I loved my brother fiercely. I always will, but he wasn't the right one for you. I don't want you to spend the rest of your life missing out on something truly amazing, because of some misguided loyalty to a man who ended your relationship months before his death. Yes, you will always love him. That's expected, but would he have wanted you to never move on after he left you?”
Harsh as she made it sound, Alice was always straight to the point. Plus, she was right this time, damn it. “You're right. I know you are, but... can I really get into another relationship with a vampire? I wouldn't live through it if I did and was left again, Ali. Whatever this is between Eleazar and I... it's explosive. Can I trust that it’s real, or is it just because of whatever lingering venom is trapped in me? I know I'm not strong enough to resist giving myself to him completely if I go to him, Ali. It practically broke me to leave him standing there two weeks ago. It's only gotten harder to turn away from him since then.”
Alice chuckled, then offered, “That’s the way with mates, Bells. You should have seen Em and Rose’s first months. She was fighting her desire for him the second she saw him, because of her past. He was fighting his because he didn't want to scare her. Thankfully, it didn't take long for them to realise they were mates. They were fully immersing in their mating bond just hours later, after they finally came to their senses. Do me a favor, Sweetie. Clear your mind of everything, then tell me what your instincts are practically screaming for you to do.”
I let out a whooshed breath, then closed my eyes to do as she asked. Everything in me was begging to go to Eleazar. My heart ached that I kept walking away from him. I walked out onto my balcony, the sight of him in the pool naked again calling to me. With that, I rushed to say, “I need to go to him, Ali. Thanks. Give Jasper a kiss for me.”